Help! Reconciled with girlfriend but had fight last night!

[rnorth]

After a two week breakup where my girlfriend made it very clear we were done, then slowly relented and came back, we happily reconciled a little over a week ago, talking through our doubts and fears and acknowledging some realities. I won't bore you with the details, but the bottom line is that she has to move accross country at the end of the summer and we agreed to revisit this topic when the time is right.

 

Anyway to last night, we had a wonderful evening but I noticed she was a bit "edgy". Yesterday was the first day for her to quit smoking and she also was very tired. We had a wonderful dinner, complete with a bottle of wine and some after dinner drinks and she decided to stay over. We were physically intimate and it was passionate and wonderful and I held her as we drifted towards sleep. The dispute occurred soon afterwards. She had brought her dog, which I love and enjoy very much, over yesterday, and the dog got sick in my bathroom. I alerted her to this and held the dog while it was ill then cleaned up after it, all of which she very much appreciated. But she was stressed about the dog as it was pacing in my room. I tried to calm her and stated "Don't worry about ******", to which she replied, "I can't believe you said that". I assured her that it came out wrong, that I didn't mean that I don't care about her dog. She tried to calm down but finally got up and said, "I don't want to stay here anymore tonight". She was clearly angry, but I also am upset because this occurred so shortly after the reconciliation. I told her that I love her dog and she knows that I have done a lot for the animal. I am worried that we may be on thin ice and something like this could send us through....

 

Any thoughts?

[GeeCee]

I am worried that we may be on thin ice and something like this could send us through....

 

Any thoughts?

 

Surely this is the downside of getting the ex back. The balance of power shifts and we are constantly walking on egg-shells afraid that the smalles thing will have them running for the hills.

 

Ok, there is an issue that she has just stopped smoking, so she may have been a little tetchy. That does not help. I think that you should give her some space to reflect on what has happened and the call her and try and find out what is going through her mind.

 

You are going to need to talk. She has to realise that she cannot run at the first sign of trouble - too habit forming.

 

Good luck.

 

G xx

[rnorth]

She tried to call this morning when I was out and stopped by on her way to a wedding. No words about last night, but she appeared to be okay. She asked if I would be around later so we could "do something". She seemed a bit sheepish so she is probably feeling a little insecure about last night also.

 

Surely this is the downside of getting the ex back. The balance of power shifts and we are constantly walking on egg-shells afraid that the smalles thing will have them running for the hills.

 

Thanks for the words. I am not going to dwell on this as really my only sin was in not speaking my heart very well last night and agitating her already agitated condition. But it is important for both of us to simply be able to quickly forgive these minor incidents and be better preapred for when something more important creeps up.

 

The important thing is she reached out right away which is nice.