:( Girl problem - venting frustration

[Santa]

Hey, before I start, I would just like to say the reason im posting this, is because I feel like im exploding!

ANyway, to cut a long story short, I like this girl, and she seemed to like me at the start, but I had doubts if I liked her, then I eventually gave in and decided I liked her. She showed good body language, but I know sometimes we warp things to what we want to hear, so I wasn't prepaired to make a fool of myself asking her out - I decided to wait for a moment when we were both alone, and there was eye contact or something. As you might of guessed, that situation never came And so I decided to ask her at a party thing. Again, that chance was ruined by... well the whole amtosphere (loud music, drunkiness, crowded rooms etc). Bad thing is, she only showed me a little attention (looking a me as she wlaked past me leaning against a wall with my mate), but that might of been because I was with a bunch of girls, and well, if i saw her with a bunch of guys i would jump to conclusions.

Anyway, so I see her today, and she basically didn't make any obvious signs towards me (ie any i saw), but i was determined to ask her out none the less. However, for some dumb reason I didn't catch up with her?! I guess obviously subconsciously giving myself a chance to not ask her Anyway, she joins her mates, then my mate goes past me and sits next to her and asks her if she wants to go somewhere in a few knights time (I guess a party), she goes yeah, then he asks her mates. I know he likes her, but well, after that I totally paniced and decided not to approach... I know they have a small friendship basis, and fair game to him, hes trying to get in with her, but well... I dunno what to do?! All i guess I can do is make some obvious sign I like her, like stare at her for 30 mins until she notices me staring, then make eye contact and ask her out... But thats gonna be hard to do!

Basically situation summed up:

I have strong feeling she liked me, but her body language has nearly totally stopped doing anything towards me (we haven't been close or tlaked recently, but she still hasn't been eyeing me up from a distance).

I feel that my hesitation about my feelings for her, and me not capitalising on any situation has perhaps made her think I don't like her, so shes perhaps given up on me? And also the whole thing with me chatting to other girls and stuff...

Also, my mates getting closer and closer to asking her out properly I guess... So perhaps need to mak a move ASAP!

Oh and by the way, advice of "Just ask her!" isn't that helpfull... Thank you!

[xxALONExx]

Minus the second person that is inching closer to asking her out I'm in the exact same situation. That said I'm going become a hypocrit and give you some advice, that I should use myself.

 

You're right, you've got to make your move and make it quick. Though don't pressure her into being your girlfriend in the sense of seeing each other exclusivly. Take her out and make sure she knows it's date but nothing too serious allow her to go out with the other guy as well and make up her mind who she likes more. Though going about things in that manner will put a lot of pressure on you to make sure she has a great time everytime she's with you so that she'll end up with you.

 

I know where you are coming from by saying you didn't know for sure how you felt about her at first but now you know you like her. That she was all over you during that period and now she's not. And wanting to ask her out but waiting for that "storybook time" that never comes in real life. And on that subject I've honestly got nothing to say because if I did I'd say it to myself. I do know that regret is worse than rejection and I'm suffering from a sever case of regret and it sounds like you are too.

[Santa]

Yeah! Your right! That is what it's like! And I also knew your advice before you said it... but as we all know, its a case of doing it

Heres a list of the signs as such:

1. First time we met I was in the kind of in the mood to like chat up girls etc, because I had just had all my convidence rebuilt after varius girls asking me out, and wlel advice on being confident etc. I think this paid off, and i sat next to her, and instead of aksing anyone else for help, she asked me a few times. I got straight in there, invading her personal space and everything - touching arm, getting about 2 inches away etc. AFter that I saw her scan my body up and down. Good sign.

2. She used to always try to make eye contact with me in the corridors etc and look at me. Im guessing because because she was interested in me and flattered by my first impression. However, theres a small chance she saw me as someone who could be her friend... but thats unlikely perhaps.

3. Upon entering rooms, or just looking into the room etc, she always looked straight into my eyes. he did the same when she wlaked into the room. A good sign, but I blew it, because I still hadn't fallen for her yet - stage 1 was just me being flirty or showing off or something.

4. Whenever I paid any interest in her convo, she would always pay her attention just on me, even if I hadn't said a word. Likewise, when im having convo's, she would join in and speak to me and look at me the whole time.

5. During these convo's I noticed signs, like obviously looking at my face/eyes etc, and rubbing rists, exposing palms, les widened, leaning forward, pushing out chest etc.

6. Sometimes she would see me outside, and there would be a kind of weird exchange of looking... Like both of us doing something but fixed our eyes on each other instead of the task. This was during the time I started liking her.

7. Possible nothing, but she came in one day with nail polish on etc, which isn't usual

8. We try to sit next to each other

9. She starts convo's with me, but they don't often lead anywhere.

10. The very last sign that I can positively say was at this party thing, when i was leaning against a wall, and she walked past and looked directly at me, slowing down slightly from her group. Later I noticied she made solo trips or with one friend through this room, for no real reason, perhaps to get my attention? But I wasn't in the room as such, I was on the dance floor, and I could see her go in there and come out of there, meanign she went through there. She didn't approach me on the dance floor, but I was dancing in groups, and I couldn't approach her, because the only times I saw her was when I saw her going in and out of the room (the room has 2 doors), but I would have to get through about 50 people to reach her, and by that time she would most likely be gone (the place was noisy, dark and crowded).

[PinkTink]

I would JUST DO IT!! you ahve nuthing to lose and all to gain!

[xxALONExx]

This is scary. I'm not joking what so ever when I say this, in my case I couldn't have written steps 1-6 any more accuratly.

 

But anyway, you've got two choices let it all hang out and go for it or live in regret. Like you said, you know what you've gotta do it's just a matter of doing it. I think it's too late for my situation, but I wish you the best of luck!