Does it work the 2nd time around???

[tiger_lilies]

Has anyone out there gotten back together with their ex's and have it work out even better the second time around??? What are the chances that it works out in the long run when you break up for anywhere from 3 to 6 months and then get back together?

Stories and advice welcomed.

[cobro]

Hi tiger

 

I got back with my ex after she broke up with me and went back to her ex. About 5 months later I got her back, it was great for the first month or so, then it went downhill. I couldn't trust her and she just was not the same person mentally, physically, sexually, everything. I had a hard time accepting she was not the same girl I dated before, but to be honest with you, the guy she broke up with me for ragged her out, she became a selfish, permiscous party girl who didn't care at all about how I felt. She constantly talked to her ex and lied to me. She was just not the same, period. Well we dated for another month or so after I realized I had made a bad mistake, but I was too "in love" to tell her I wanted to break up, she basically broke up with me after I went off on her for being such a, well you know.... I had put up with so much from her I couldn't take it, though I loved her like crazy and wanted her to be someone she couldn't be, the nice sweet girl I remembered. That was about 5 months ago, I have been single ever since. I lost some friends after the breakup also because they couldn't handle me being upset about the breakup. So because I got back with my ex, and let her break my heart one last time, my life changed completely. I lost friends, now I have new ones. I have a great new job and new life ahead of me, although its taken me these 5 months to realize it. I now know that exes are exes for a reason! Never again will I be hurt like that, never again. By the way, I still hear from her from time to time and hear that she's been out in clubs from friends and coworkers, hear that she's been sleeping around, etc... It hurt at first but you know what, what goes around comes around. I wish her luck in her new life and I know that second chances in relationships are very risky, especially if one person has their heart into it more than the other person does.

[ziggystar]

everything is possible, i have 3 examples of couples that got back together and got married or are about to get married. couples ranging from 27 years old to 45 years old. having spent 3 months apart to 5 years apart. so you never know, but at the same time each individual case is so different. in these cases, we're talking about marriage being the pivotal point on which these couples got back together. these cases have been reunited within the last 6 months.

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey yea, I'm not sure what the odds are but I'm sure if you get back the odds should lean towards it being a better relationship the 2nd time around.

 

I've only done this once and it was within 3months but we'd been dating for I think 7-8 months at the time. People just think differently I guess, even though she treated me like crap at the time, I'm really glad we got back together coz now she's kinda different and the real her's starting to show after she realised that it wasn't a smart thing to do, the thigns she did. I too realised that I'd rather have gotten something from her, wether it'd b bad or good than nothing at all and that we do need each other, no matter how totally opposite our personalities are.

 

If you are willing to get back and so is he, then the chances of you working out the 2nd time will be a lot higher.

 

Heb

[kleptoz28]

I dated a girl a few years back, broke up with her due to her living arrangements at the time, and then ran into her and started dating her again this February.

 

She told me in March that she needed space, broke up with me, and then called 3 days later saying she'd made a mistake. Well... she changed her mind again, and we're currently on what she calls a "break" so she can get her life straight.

 

Still not sure how my situation will turn out the 3rd (4th?) time around, but I do believe that if the reason for the breakup is an issue that one person is dealing with, and the two people still do love each other that it can work. Just don't make the mistake of rushing back into it too soon, before the other person has had time to sort themselves out.