Should I?

[Lenuva4]

Sorry, this may be slightly long, but I have a serious issue to address. I've been going out with this girl for a bit more than a month now, and I can tell that im getting the short end of the stick. She doesn't treat me too nicelt, and when I point this out, she just tries to play the innocent spiel and then feigns the issue. Also, she isn't very polite...I can understand when a person has shortcomings, but I don't think this person is right for me.

 

I would think that any other person in just that type of situation would break up if no efforts to stop or improve have been made by the other, correct? But, the thing is, one or two other people closer to her have started figuring this out and slightly threatening me and telling her. So now, I'm being ganged up on and pinned in a corner. SHe approaches me on the issue, after saying she was ready to kill me for ignoring her, and now I feel that if I DO, break up with her, she will be severely angered or upset, along with some of my other friends.

 

What do I do?

[Michael2]

You do what is best for you.

 

Who cares what her friends think or even yours, they dont walk in your shoes do they? Do they experience her insecurities and rudeness? I dont so.

 

If she isnt treating the way u expect, give her the good old hasta lavista

[TrueHeart]

My friend,

 

Believe me when I say--

 

RUN!

 

Someone so manipulative will only destroy you in the end. Especially if her friends or acquaintances are threatening you...! What place is it of theirs? You are at a stage right now that isn't too committed.. You're not attached enough..

 

She sounds like she isn't ready for a relationship... Especially one who doesn't respect you in the least when it comes to how you feel. This is called emotional and mental abuse. I know, because I'm involved in a relationship that is emotionally/mentally abusive-- I have since ended it despite the threats of me being the worst person on the planet... IT hurt at first, but then I realized that I was better off because I deserve someone who respects me and who will love me for the way I am.... give unconditional love.

 

In breaking it to her, you want to avoid the blame-game. Simply approach it with that you would like to "share something with her"-- if she gets upset, it will be your perfect window to express that you feel like you cannot connect with her on her level, that you simply do not understand what she needs--- remove yourself from the situation ever so subtly. It will cause friction, I guarentee that... but you cannot avoid it.. Just make sure that you understand (and more importantly) accept that you are better off without her... Don't let her "goons" GUILT TRIP you into staying with her..

 

Remember, your first instinct on things, is usually the right one.... And simply don't pass it off like a shortcoming.... There is NO excuse for someone who doesn't respect you-- it means they truly don't know what they have, or don't love you at all....

[Tom_Bombadil]

Dude, your situation sounds like one I had about 4 years ago. Get out of this relationship as soon as you can before things get worse. Red flags should have been going up when she said she was going to "kill" you for ignoring her. I'm almost sure she didn't mean it literally, but thats a pretty immature and mean thing to say. With the attitude she has, she's got no right to make you out to be the bad guy.

 

She sounds a bit self-centered and plain mean. She doesn't seem to have any regard for your feelings. You can really find yourself someone who will treat you better. Dump her!

 

Also, don't worry about any threats you received. After I broke up with my verbally abusive ex, she threatened to send another ex of hers after me. As I expected, nothing happened.

[Jen23]

Just my opinion but i would run while you can. I mean you guys just started dating and you are having problems. You should be in the honeymoon stage right now. From my expierence i wouldn't put up with things that i didn't like in the beginning because you may wind up wasting alot of time in the end (I wasted four years!).

[rlemon]

One month? You should be the happiest guy in the world. What are you waiting for. Walk out!