How am I supposed to know what to do now?

[cutiepie20]

My ex-boyfriend and I have now been broken up for about 1 month. The reason we broke up was kinda stupid and when he asked me to get back together with him (about 1 week after the breakup I said that I have to think about things. Then about a week after that I told him that I think that we should just remain friends. This is not what I really wanted, but I was really scared of being in a relationship and getting hurt. Recently I have asked HIM if he wants to get back together and now he says that he doesnt know. He still calls me and I still call him, but sometimes at the beginning of the conversation he will be really nice and I can tell that he really wants to talk to me... and then by the end of the conversation he'll act like he doesnt really care. I am just wondering if he is pLAYING HARD TO GET or if he is just toying with my emotions. Before the break up we were together for about 9 months and we never really had any problems accept for ME breaking up with him a couple times (4 the same reason of me being scared of getting hurt...he knows this)! I really really love him and I know that I won't make the same mistake again. What should I do? What is he thinking? Please give me some advice!

Thanks

[Tinkerbell]

There is no way for us to tell what he's thinking. If you want to know, you should just ask him. I know confessing that you still love him and want to be with him will make you vulnerable, but if you really do feel that way you'll be willing to go out on a limb for him. I think the reason he may seem weird on the phone would be because he's unsure about what you're feeling and he doesn't know what to say. I suggest you talk to him and let him know how you feel. Worst thing that could happen is he won't feel the same, and although that would hurt a great deal, at least you'd know for sure and then begin the process of getting over him.

[Stingseed]

Hello Guys

 

I am heart broken. I need advice with ex-girlfriiend the no-contact of sort and stuff

 

This is what happen. I meet her year and half ago. We fell deeply in love well the usual as you guys may know. At the end of January she comes out saying that she has done something horrible and that i am going to hate for it. (Don't get her wrong she loves me very much). Well anyways she came out saying that she cheated on me with some guy she knew for some monhs. Well the usual happen she said she was sorry, and that she still loved me. The thing is that she fell so deeply in love with me that she never had the chance to meet other people thereforeeee was one of the reasons for getting close to this guy. The other reason is that she said I was to jealous and not financially stable. Which I agree. I know that I must show her that these faults are corrected so that she can remember the guy she fell in love with and remember the good times we had. but the thing is this other guy she is seeing is getting in the way ( ohh what to do what to do?).

 

Don't get me wrong even though she is seeing this guy to this day she still calls me reason being she need to talk to me. Somtimes she just calls my office is as if she is afraid I will not answer the cell. I guess cause I tried to play the no-contact thing but at the most I last is about 2 or 3 days me being the one to returns her calls( the dreaded call back it is). I asked if she wnas to lose me for good. her reply was no never that I am not going to lose her. I asked her if the reason she is still telling she loves me and wants me in any way a soft way of telling me she does not want to see me no more? she says no. I am saying it cuae i mean it. I asked her Are you having a difficult time in finding the words to let me go for good and thereforeeee the reason you keep calling me? she said no. I call cause I wanna talk to you. These are some questions I have asked her there are 2 ro 3 more which I will post later. The thing is that she calls me, work and cell and when we do talk we still some of the nice little cute conversations we always have had and I do still make her laugh and whatnot. but her is the twister. I have asked her to go out and she always says maybe and never does. I tell her if she loves me, calls me, tells me she don't wanna lose me, then way can't we go out to dinner or concerts. her response is she is not ready yet, and apologizes for putting me through all of this. She is still very open with me even telling me she was afraid she might be pregant with his baby which it turns out she is not(thank god)at one point she told me she is not to serious with the guy she is seeing and that he is not serious with her cause they have only have been seeing each other for 3 months 2 months of it being behind my back. but that she still needs to see other people which drives me crazy, but I don't show here that emotion I just try to talk about it and tell her that I love her and ask why is she adding this confusing to herself and to comeback to me. I know I must be nagging her to death with all the questions I have asked her, but the reason I do it is to make sure she still loves me, does not want to lose me and most important is to make sure she is not being nice to me just to not hurt my feeling anymore. 2 weeks ago I convinced her not to go another date, and went on further I said that we should seriously try to work things out, and that I am the only man she needs. guess what she said? that i am right and that we should try, but 2 days later she changed her mind saying that even though she is seeing someone that there is another person that she wants to date thereforeeee saying she need to see other people not to mention that. This has been going for 4 weeks now everytime I seem to get close it seems I am getting further (what am I doing wrong?).

 

Well guys I do want to get back with her very badly I am deeply in love with her but I have made some mistakes in doing so. Can you help me? She is with someone but not in love, she feels she need to date but she still calls me, does tthe no-contact rule apply here? please reply......

[dikaia880]

First of all, Stingseed, There are plenty of people who are willing to help give advice, so start your own post, you'll get the advice you need, so will the other people....

As for Cutiepie20...I'm thinking that since he put it out there and you held back, that he doesn't want to go through getting back together with you and then have you get scared again... You need to go to him, and tell him how you feel, put it out there...The more risk that is involved the more you have to gain...What fun is living life outside the fire? Sure you could get hurt by putting yourself out there, but at the same time you will mostly get hurt by not doing putting it out there!

Tell him how you feel and make it clear to him that it won't happen again...you can't really blame him for being cautious if you've done it 4 times before.

Best of luck!!!