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How long is too long to wait?


silkysliplover
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All depends, is there still contact, or none at all, friends...?, you still socialize with her on a regular basis, hangout, Need input (details)

 

 

That i believe would be a good thing if you still BOTH are friends and have been able to express that without feeling like you are in a relationship.

 

Whatever you do don't Impel the feeling of Pressure, lets things come natural, ever hear of the saying

 

"if you love something let it go, If it's doesn't come back, It was never yours"

 

Let her come back, usually in most cases a girl will hide her emotions because of fear of being hurt or let down by the guy, well i see it as the same for guys, if you just wait it out, UNTIL you have some solid structure to again build (sorry shots in the dark here).. first Trust, and respect for each other again,(or whatever was lost) once you have that established than you can start to move forward.

 

 

Here is an idea

 

Do things under the justification of "friends" to play it safe ask her out for a casual date, perhaps On New years eve (day into Night) if she doesn't already have plans, it will surly be a good time to arrange a meeting to go grab lunch, or a movie, you know what i mean.....just keep it Kosher.

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There is contact here, we don't live in the same town, I live 2 hours away. I have limited my calling to once per week. Limited emails. I went down the day after Christmas to exchange presents, only there 4 hours, she said she felt awkward, but I'm not sure why, maybe because her feelings are still there? Do you think she could be seeing someone else? We are at a friendly level right now.

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hmmm, hard to say my Friend, I'm not leaning towards that idea, What exactly did she mean when she said she felt awkward? about what.....That is the Question, was it in a bad tone of voice, or more She felt awkward Being apart, just a thought?

 

You can sometimes read a person body language, it can benefit you if you know what too look for.

 

I have to say at least you thought of her, and she realizes that...a Plus on your side of all this, She still knows you care, Because you do, Women have the ability to sense things like that in use guys, I sometimes call it the "just know" feeling...They are usually right.

 

I saw you wrote limited calling, and your e-mails...well at least your not like some guys who throw themselves out to Extreme measures to Attempt to win her back with the constant calling, and that level of desperation us guys sometimes think is best. Not at all ..... So i give you credit there, for allowing space.

 

Now too the distance between you two, 2 hours isn't all that bad...ask yourself this question, If she lived 20-30 min away would you visit more? do you think she wants to see you more, any sort of VIBE you get? her hinting to your next visit, your next call...E-mail you have to know what to look for, and your the one here who knows her best...

 

You said "friendly" how Friendly is that exactly? have you done something since the Break>? hang out....coffee, lunch...etc

 

I see your doing what you should be doing, if you want to step it up a bit ask her what she has planned for next week, BUT DON'T SET A DATE.....Don't give her the chance to say "OH Friday i have plans" than your a sitting Duck, in a large body of water..and you have set yourself up for rejection, instead just casually say "so what you doing next week Or for the Big New Year" and see where that takes you.

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We played a a friendly game of chess, I had shown her how to play over the summer. During the game, I asked some poinyant questions, like 1 month after the breakup, her and her mom had driven up to my town and I wondered why she didn't call me. She tells me (I believe her) that her mom had asked alot of questions of her about why we are not together. She wants to go through this indpeendent streak and her mother is not for it. Meeting her mom before, I could see she could be a loose cannon in this situation and still have something slip out. I gotta tell you, that was more pain knowing she was in the same town than the initial breakup. I am getting to the point now where I feel need to move on. I guess if I knew there was absolutely, positively NEVER NEVER a chance of us resuming our relationship then it would be alot easier to move on, the unknown is what kills us. I love her like I've never loved anyone else, but it's eating away at me.

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