My mind aches

[buffalosoldier]

My question is this.Can you ever tell whether somebody genuinely loves you,or just loves the situation/loves the fact that they are in a relationship where they get sex,affection,money spent on them and whatnot.I mean why would you want to give all that up to live a lonely life without any of those perks?

 

Do any of you guys think this is possible?can people just genuinely love a person?is it all about having faith? Coz if it is i am really lacking in faith.

 

When i am with my bf i am fine,i know he cares for me and things are hunky-dory,but on my own and i cant stop thinking 'what if'.What if he's taking me for a ride and doesnt really care for me the way that i do him?what if he just doesnt want to be on his own,and would rather be with me than be lonely?

 

Sometimes i wonder if theres hope for anybody.Sorry i dont mean to be pessimistic but it just seems like a waste of time for me sometimes.I dont want to end my relationship,coz i know id be no happier without him and i feel like i love him.

 

Please help,im just feeling really tired of constantly asking myself these questions and finding no answer to them.i should probably speak to my bf,i know,but if i keep questioning the way he feels about me im going to lose him anyway.Nobody wants to be with someone that cant trust them do they.Help.

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey Buffalo Soldier!

 

I think everyone has thoughts like that and they don't get better, the more you think, the more you worry so stop thinking! Call him, comfort urself and don't be so crazy. Chances will be that he's not. You gotta trust guys, most of them are genuine. I mean sure i'd flirt with other chicks and all but I don't think I'd ever cheat on my gf.

 

Don't let the bad guys spoil it all for you. I'm sure your guy loves you heaps and I do think (unless its a one night stand) that a guy can love you for real, at the time and not know why but if they've ever loved you, it'd b true!

 

I think we can genuinely love a person, I do I think. Or maybe it's just "fake love" or something like that older ppl think it is. Just coz I'm a teen still but I still think what i feel is real.

 

Thought I do think, if you love him enough, don't give up, don't think about what you want, think about what he wants, if you love him so, you'd put urself on the line wouldn't you? you'd sacrifise everything you want, just for him? Coz i kno i would... so yes, if you feel for him still then don't give up.

 

I don't know how you're going to trust him but I suppose that could improve through time.

[simply complicated]

hey soldier, true love is almost impossible to come by, this you obviously know. But if theres one thing i've learned, to truly love someone, you have to be able to have the greatest time with one another without doing anything except hold, kiss and talk, try it, go for a walk at night when no ones around, take him to a nice place, sit and enjoy the view as well as eachothers company, if at any point in the night he says something like "this is boring lets go" then your question will pretty much be answered, but if not, you'll show much more love and affection than ever.

 

Lingering doubts are the worst, i hated them, it drives me crazy, you'll jump to the worst conclusions and have them stuck in your head, but if the person is right for you, you'll learn that doubts are simply phases which can easily be conqoured.

So switch up the situation, instead of taking him out or going somewhere fancy or wild, just spend nights alone together, and don't just do it for a day, keep it up for a couple of weeks, then see how he reacts to that situation, you'll defenitly notice a change in him, it's just depends on wheather he changes for better or worse.

hope this helps, it's an opinion from my experience, and you know my situation, so good luck....well, you don't need luck, pm me we shall talk some more