Took a couple steps back today

[velvetapathy]

So overall i have been doing pretty good i feel, There are a lot of opportunities opening up for me at my work and overall being with my family again has been nothing short of wonderful.

 

However after talking to friend earlier today I was set back a bit... He brought up the fact that my ex has been actively chasing one of his friends and has been for at least a 2 months now(mind you we have been broken up since july and she was the one that broke up with me.) Her and I still talk about once a week sometimes more if our work schedules collide or not(we work at the same place) I kind of new this day would come however I was totally blindsided to hear that she was already looking again. Overall just kind of a bad day

[Sadman84]

So overall i have been doing pretty good i feel, There are a lot of opportunities opening up for me at my work and overall being with my family again has been nothing short of wonderful.

 

However after talking to friend earlier today I was set back a bit... He brought up the fact that my ex has been actively chasing one of his friends and has been for at least a 2 months now(mind you we have been broken up since july and she was the one that broke up with me.) Her and I still talk about once a week sometimes more if our work schedules collide or not(we work at the same place) I kind of new this day would come however I was totally blindsided to hear that she was already looking again. Overall just kind of a bad day

 

I know you guys don't work, but maybe you aren't ready to be talking with her on a regular basis. I know I am not ready to talk with my ex, and it would crush me to talk to her, and then hear about her and other guys. If i'm in her life right now, I want to be number one, not just some other guy.

[hpsowce]

I think it's natural for the dumper to move on more quickly than the person that got dumped, after all they've got what they really wanted now right? It's unfortunate that you've been made aware of this but to look at it positively it's highlighted an area of pain you need to work through.

 

It's only natural to be hurt by this news but you must accept that she's bound to find somebody new eventually. You may be harbouring thoughts that maybe one day you two will get back together, that's always a dangerous place to move on from because any improvements to your mental wellbeing are always going to be dependent on what the other person does.

 

Sometimes it's just sad to think someone you cared so much about is now harbouring desires for another, it stinks, but eventually you'll meet someone else and move on too. Just remember that people change, she's not the person that you loved or the person that loved you anymore, you have to go through a grieving process for the loss of that person and then dust yourself off and move on.

 

As you said, it's a bad day, on bad days you need to consciously decide not to beat yourself up, you need to go easy on yourself and not dwell on negative thoughts.