i have a very strange problem

[carbine]

this is very hard and uncomfortable to write about . i went to my cousins wedding in canada (im in america) and there i met this really cute girl at the wedding and we were doing semi amount of flirting my mom walks over and goes "can you believ this is little tara !" i was like "what you mean" she said "last time we saw her she was so small its been like 7-8 years" then it hit me tara (the girl) was my cousin that i only met once when i was 9 or 10 (im 17 now) we both got akward and sorta went our separate ways for the few days i saw her , well she pm'ed me a few days ago and we talked for like 3 hours we have so much in common and i still do have feelings for her (i know how sick it is and its wrong) so my question is does anyone know good ways to get yourself over someone or what i should do ? thx 4 reading

[optimistic person]

it is common for you to have that feeling your a human beening dissite it is your cousin. somethings you can't control your feeling and that fact that you like this girl (cousin). Just don't talk to her that much and when you do channel the conversation in ways that you will feel as though your are talk to a close relative or a good friend but don't flirt and don't ask if she has a boyfriend. don't go out until your feeling has subside and you feel comfortable. Ok hope this helps

[S4il]

haha sounds like a Jerry springer show, Nah I'm j/k...well your mom sort of threw everything (karma/chemistry) wise out the door when she mentioned she was you cousin...i could only imagine the look on your face..

 

well liking a cousin isn't all that bad, everyone has heard of stories of family members dating, like those "You Might Be a red-Neck, If your Mom and dad are both cousins." (just some humor) but relax...it's just some family member, that you weren't aware was family, No big deal, you have feelings for her. Why..? you just meet her. you have things in common, Well you are related..lol (more humor) i would just stay in touch, see what happens...can't say if it's wrong to date family, or if it's right...all depends on what your family would think.

[Mar]

I have to admit, I had the BIGGEST crush on my cousin for years....got all tongue-tied every time he was around, and couldn't look at him because I thought he was the best-looking guy I'd ever seen. Unfortunately, there was that little matter of him being directly related! Eventually that just sunk in-"Mar, that's your damn COUSIN, you fool!" That and the fact that I started noticing that there were plenty of OTHER great guys out there, and didn't have to pine over my cousin anymore!

 

In a word, just don't act on it. I'm sure there are tons of people who have crushes on family members, (as a matter of fact I KNOW there are, because I was actually curious at one point and did a impromptu survey on how many of my friends had a cousin or whatever they thought was hot, and it was a LOT) the key to avoiding hearing "Deliverance" in your head is to just simply remain close like FAMILY. In your particular case, I'm guessing this isn't an issue since there seems to be a distance problem there.

 

Relax....you're not weird, or sick, or perverted....you were attracted to someone you didn't know was related! You'll get over it, once some other cutie catches your eye. Trust me on this!

 

(Oh, and as a footnote? I recently saw my hunky cousin after 17 years of NOT seeing him, since he lives in Cali, and STILL thought he was hot....but I also immensely liked his wife Caroline, so that was that....lol)

[mel_o_dell]

It all depends how close of cousins you are. It is illegal to date first or second cousins, but third and so on is ok. So if you are third cousins, then you don't have a problem, unless your whole family just finds it immoral. But, its not illegal and in my own opinion, if you have feelings for this person (for your sake I hope its not first or second cousin) then I would sit down and talk with her about it. If she is a first or second cousin, well then you are going to have to do whatever is in your power to put romantic feelings aside and realize that nothing can happen between the two of you. Its hard to put someone out of your mind that you have feelings for, especially when its something like this, but if it is a situation where you have to forget about her, than try and keep yourself busy, go out with friends and be occipied. I know this is cliche, but there are lots of fish in the sea, and you will meet someone else. Hope I was of some help. Good luck.