marieclaire

He called on Friday; I was at work, he just wanted to talk. I told him I'd call him the next day, and I did. He didn't call all day Saturday. I had the feeling he'd gone to the city to be with friends. This morning I got a phone call...he had gone into the city and said he didn't get my message yesterday. He was taking the train back, but he had no one to pick him up. His cell was about to die and he couldn't get hold of his sister or his mom (they were still at mass/church). I offered to try to get his sister for him, but he said her cell was off. Long story short, I ended up picking him up. Now I feel terrible. If he hadn't called "just because" on Friday, I don't think I'd have gone. But he knows what kind of person I am...I do anything for the people I care about. He mentioned something that he wanted to do together, but we didn't "make plans". I am so confused. Part of me knows that if he called Friday, he misses me...maybe the ice is beginning to thaw. Maybe he really did just get scared, or need time and space. Maybe my actions did push him away. He could have called someone else to pick him up today. The other part of me feels like I'm being played. Maybe he tried to call someone else and I was all he had left. I don't know. All I do know is I won't call him. I didn't before, and I won't now. I just miss him so much that sometimes it hurts to breathe.

My boyfriend (or ex, I'm not sure) and I have been seeing each other for a couple of months. Things were really incredible; we both began to fall hard and fast...kind of like a fairytale. We did so much together in such a short amount of time, spent so much time together, were essentially inseperable. One night after a particularly wonderful evening (about three weeks in) he decided that it was too much too fast and it scared him; he wanted to slow down. he was afraid it would all disappear as quickly as it happened. I was devastated. Later that night, he apologized, begged me to forgive him. I did, but I'd become uncertain, insecure...afraid of what might or might not happen next. So I began to have episodes of uncertainty. I'd get emotional. Then we began to argue. A week later, after a particularly unpleasant argument, he told me his feelings had changed; he wasn't sure what was going to happen. He didn't want to break up, but his heart told him to take a few steps back and see what happened...he just wanted to make me aware of what was going on. I became a basketcase. I wanted to break it off...I pulled away, he pulled me back in. So we stayed together. Things would be okay for a week, then we'd go out and I'd either end up crying or we would have an argument. Didn't happen all the time, but we had a few bad arguments...all stemming from the fact that I had become extremely worried/afraid of getting hurt...and I was hurt, because his feelings/behavior seemed to change from day to day. He was completely unpredictable. Last Sat, something happened while we were out. I drank too much and blew up...we had a horrible argument. The next day he told me he didn't want to see me anymore. He said my behavior had changed everything; his feelings "today" werent what they were yesterday. I debated with him; I didn't understand how he could just walk away from it without giving things a chance to work themselves out. We'd had three or four incredible weeks, and then three weeks where things were rocky and emotional. Finally, at the end of the discussion, he told me we could continue seeing each other, but things were going to change. He didn't feel the same and it would not be on the level that it was. He agreed to take some time and see what happens. But if we weren't breaking up, he needed a break...some time to be alone. Some space. He didn't call at all for three days. Then something happened on my end and I asked him to call me. He did. We chatted normally as though nothing was wrong...but he made no mention of seeing me at all, and he ended the call with, "I'm sure I'll talk to you sometime soon." I'm not sure when "soon" might be...not sure what I should do...not sure if we are together or if he really broke things off but just let things slide to appease me. How long do I wait before asking him whether or not we will really work on this? I don't plan on calling again, but it's so incredibly difficult. If he hasn't called or asked to seem me in a week or two, do I just assume it's over? do I ask him in a week if he wants to go see a movie or something? This is a man who called me five times a day and wanted to see me six hours at a time, at least three days a week (often more) on average. Now he acts as though I mean next to nothing...not in our conversations...but through his actions. When he hangs up, he is very noncommittal and withdraws. PLEASE HELP. I have NO idea what to do.