TJ323

The last time we spoke on the phone (last Monday when she broke up with me), I panicked and pleaded to not break up. A week has passed and I don't want her to think I'm still being selfish by not respecting her space and decision. I've used that time to really THINK about things and I want to tell her so bad that I understand her decision now but I don't know if she'll appreciate that, or if it'll just annoy her more since she wanted space. And yeah, this past month has been rocky between us but things were generally pretty good so it makes it even that much harder.

Hi MayJane, I'm in the same boat as you, except I am struggling with the NC. My ex (went out for 2 years) broke up with me last Monday and ever since, she has contacted me over AIM I think 3 of those days (just super small talk) but since then she hasn't, so I would cave in and message HER with small talk (somehow it comforts me talking to her on AIM but once the convo becomes stale, it hurts even more). It hurts because although she doesn't have another guy (I don't think), it seems like she is over me, acting like nothing ever happened, and talking to me like a stranger. Maybe because it's too soon, but I always wonder if she misses "us" because I sure do (I've been waking up around this time because I can't sleep; 4:50 AM right now).

What do you mean?

Hello all, I just came accross this forum after I myself experienced a break up two days ago and I think it's great to see that Superdave and everyone else is offering advice and comfort for five years. With that being said, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me two nights ago. Long story short, we met two years ago at a junior college and our relationship of course had ups and downs but was great; talked everyday on AIM, saw each other every week, did a lot of things together, and even shared the same hobbies (mostly playing games together). Of course the downfall is that we were so into each other, we didn't really spend time with any other friends (which I was/am fine with.) Fast forward to now, she just transferred to a UC last month (about 2 hours away) and I am finishing college next month. Our relationship started to become really rocky about a month ago (when she moved). She had a huge confrontation with her dorm roommate which caused my gf to move out and find an apartment close to campus. Stress tends to get to her sometimes so with having to move out and starting her first quarter at the UC, she told me she wanted to go on a break because she has too many things to worry about, and being the genius I am, I suggested her we should stay together and I'll be there for her. She agreed but I guess the idea of ending things with me has been lingering in her head for a while, but she stayed with me anyways. Ever since it's been rocky. I mean we usually saw each other almost every weekend after that point (she would invite me up some of those times), but a couple weeks ago, her laptop broke down, she got a flat tire, now she has to deal with choosing classes for the next quarter, and finals are coming up. This led her to tell me she doesn't have time to be in a relationship and wants to focus on school and her career and broke things off with me. I mean, I can respect her feelings and I know I screwed up when I didn't give her space the first time and pushing too much. But it's such a hard pill to swallow since I myself have stress as well, but I find relief in her during stressful times, while she considers me to add to the stress. Obviously that's because I probably made some mistakes, but, what should I do? In my mind, I think things are just overwhelming at the moment so she went to an extreme or maybe now that she has things to worry about, I'm not worth the trouble? I proposed we just wait till after finals (instead of breaking up), but she firmly declined. I love her to death and know she loves me, but I'm not quite sure if I mean as much to her as she means to me. Should I just cut all contact till after we're both done with finals? Cut contact longer? Not try at all? I've been depressed lately and sleep only a few hours a night thinking about her and the situation as well as not eating normally. Also, it doesn't seem like it's affecting her nearly as much as it's affecting me, but then again I don't know if it's because she is so stressed with school or if I really don't mean that much to her. Sorry for the long post but I guess it's good to voice things out sometimes. It's just a horrible thought to not have her in my life; we both shared so many experiences and times together and can't imagine being with anyone else. Sorry again for the length and thanks in advance.