Without a doubt....I am in love with her.
Sorry this is so long but it is a big story. I hope someone can help shed some light on this for me. I have a friend of mine whom I have known for 7 years. I met her through my ex wife when we were dating. I think I have always had a crush on her from the start. Anyway, while we were engaged she started dating my ex-wife’s ex-boyfriend despite my ex telling to not go there. They had a conversation when my ex found out she was dating him and actually told her she was destined to pick up her scraps forever. Now I know that is a nasty thing to say but my friend is very concerned with how she is perceived. My friend and the boyfriend broke up. She was devastated and has not dated anyone seriously for 3 years.
We were married for 1 yr and ½ until I found out my wife was having an affair during most of the marriage. My friend told her she did not agree with her life’s decisions and she was not headed down the same road she was. She ended her friendship with my ex. She chose me over her. That was one year ago. She told me when we started hanging out that nothing could ever be because of my ex. She said nothing would ever happen. We became very close and on occasion were intimate with each other. After each encounter she freaked out a bit and said “that cannot happen again”. Well it did. She even told me that she was beginning to have feelings for me that she should not. I had begun to see another woman for about 6 months and my friend did not want to meet her because she did not want to hate her unless it was real. We cooled things down from seeing each other so much for about 4 weeks. The woman I was seeing and I stopped dating and my friend and I went back to seeing each other about 4 or 5 times a week. For the last 6 months or so this has continued. Over this time I found that was really falling in love with her. I told her how I was feeling because it was chewing me up inside to not say anything. She told me that nothing could be because her mother and father would not approve of it because I was divorced and that she had been a friend with my ex. She also said she thought of me as her brother. She said she was attracted to me when we first met but I was off limits because of my ex.
We have gone out together a few times since and she even had begun flirting with other guys in my presense, has said I should start dating other people. Then qualified that with “maybe it is what I need to push me over the edge”. Of course I got jealous with her flirting and she knew it. We had another discussion and she said that she thought we were on the same page. I told her I was definitely in love with her and wanted nothing more than to be with her. I told her I have had plenty of girlfriends and dated plenty of people and did not feel this way about any of them including my ex wife. I told her “I think I have always been in love with you I just had to find you”.
We went to dinner last night and through conversation I found out that she had a date for tonight and I told her I had a date as well for Saturday. She became very inquisitive and wanted to know her name and how I knew her. She wanted to know if her friend whom I used to work with would know her etc.
So there we are sitting in restaurant bar and she asked me to massage her neck. I did and gave her a great massage for about 30 minutes. That is the second time we have done that in public. Through the massage I told her this could be a benefit she could enjoy and she really should consider us. She told me “you are not marrying anyone yet”. I gave her a kiss on the neck when we were done and told her if I had one wish it would not be for a million dollars it would be for me to walk into this bar and meet her and introduce myself as me.
Can anyone give me some advice on how I can turn this around? I know we would be perfect together or I would not be seeking help. We are like two pees in a pod when we are together and always have great conversation and a great time. Anyone……what would make you turn around in this situation?
