missinhim00

i talked to him a couple days ago and asked if this was a permanent break up..... he said 'i really doubt it, i just need some time'........ i told him that he needs to tell me if there is no chance, so i can take care of myself... but he said 'no im serious i really doubt were breakin up for good'.. well he told me that i did nothing wrong, but his mom told me other wise... she told me that he said i never dropped the issue about what happened to him and that i "never" let him have any friends that were girls.. which is not true.. i was at his house yesterday, i knew he was at work so i went to go talk to his sisters.. after his mom told me all of that, i wrote him a letter and left it on his bed.. a couple of my friends read it and said it didnt sound desperate but it may help things out so i have no idea.. i just basically told him that i was startin to think that this was my fault and that i was sorry for not dropping the issue, and freaking out when he started talking to that other girl.. i just told him that i was scared to death of losing him, and it backfired.. i told him i was upset that i had ruined the one thing that was most important to me, i asked him to forgive me, and that IF he gave me another chance, things would be different.. i then said i miss you and love you so much........ and ended it there.. i havent talked to him yet so i have no idea how he reacted.... and i made sure not to mention that his mom had said that stuff to me, didnt want to cause any conflicts there..... well just wanted to keep everyone updated, thank you for comments so far and pleez continue with them...

ok, 2 weeks ago, my boyfriend was raped.. since then hes acted weird, different, distant, everything like that.. i tried to just accept it as his grieving over what happened to him.. when he told me about it tho he cried and cried and begged me not to leave him, and i didnt because i didnt see it as being his fault.. i was out of town when it happened... then this last week i was at tha beach so i was gone for pretty much 2 weeks straight.. well he called me one day saying him, his little sister, and some girl he works with were gunna go to tha gym and go swimmin.. and i told him that it bothered me a little, bcuz i didnt know this girl, and honestly i didnt trust any girls around him after what happened... and i told him how i felt and he got mad at me tellin me i was blowing it out of proportion, nothing was goin to happen... and i said ur gunna end up likin her i can see it.. so i finally dropped it and he went and they all hung out.. well luckily im really good friends with his little sister so i asked her about it and she said that tha girl was kinda flirtin with him, but he wasnt doin nuthin back.. so i was like alright thats cool then.. so i went and saw him at work when i got back yesterday, took him to get something to eat and just talked to him for a little.. well he got back to his house at 10 last night n i was up there wit his sister.. almost tha minute he walks in tha door, the phone rings, and its that girl.. he talked to her for a minute then said he had to go n he would see her at work tomorrow.. so i looked at him n said why did she call u n he said i dont know i guess just to talk... so i just sat there n one of his friends were over n they started talkin bout cars so i got up and walked in the other room.. a couple minutes later he came in and sat down next to me and i told him i wanted to talk so he said ok.. i asked him wat was goin on, why he had been actin different, everything.. n he said there was a lot of stuff goin on but he wasnt really sure wat was wrong.. so i told him how much it bothered me about this other girl hangin around him all of a sudden.. n he said he was sorry n i just looked at him n said do u wanna take a break or sumthin.. n he said i dont know.. i lost it.. bcuz i had seen it comin.. so i calmed myself down, looked him in the eyes, n said do u like her.. n he said who.. i said ashley.. n he said a little.. n i started tellin him how upset i was n how unfair that was bcuz of what had happened and everything.. he put his head down in his hands n wouldnt look at me.. i took off his class ring and his necklace, set them down on tha table in front of him, went over, kissed him on tha head, and he reached up to touch my face but i had already pulled away, and i said listen, i love you with all of my heart.. call me when u make ur decision, ill be waitin by tha phone.. so about an hour and a half later, he called me and said that right now he just needs friends and i was like but i love you i cant just be your friend n he kept sayin he didnt want to lose me and that he loved me and nothing would ever make him stop loving me, but right now he just needed to be alone to figure things out.. and i told him if he turned around n went out with that girl i would never talk to him again.. n he said its not even like that he just needs some time... but i really dont understand... pleez write back with any help or comments u may have.. bcuz i am NOT dealing with this very well at all....