My names Brittney. I am a 20 yr. old female in Louisville KY. I'm having a very hard time in my life right now. I dated a boy for the past for years and he was rudely ripped out of my life in a way. For no good reason...he sent me an email telling me he had cheated on me with 8 girls. One in which was one of his ex's/ best female friend. I was always jealous when they hung out. They were kinda touchy. Too much for comfort. At a concert me and some friends went to he bought her and me the same ring. Me and this boy had gone through so much in our lives. The night before the letter he had told me he loved me. I have always felt like I was in competition with this girl. I talk to her online often. I made her give me all the details of there run in. It was tourture. I tourture myself even more everyday by reading her profile and looking at her pictures daily. Nine months have past since we broke it off and I'm still obsessed. It's not that I wanna hook back up with him. I just want a boyfriend so bad. It's like in all these months not one guy has noticed me. The only few that have i was 2 picky to give them a shot. No one lives up to my ex in my mind. I know it might sound shallow. But my ex was a very attrative guy. I just feel that I cant get any good looking guys. I never seemed to have a problem with it before. My ex has screwed my life up. I have no female friends anymore. The ones I did have, have there own families now. I just want some attention. I have been neglected my whole life and have lived in an metally and physically abusive family. My life seems so worhtless at this point. For the past 9 mths. I wake up at 10:00 am...get ready, go to work at 2:00, leave at 10:00, get online till 2:00, go to sleep and do it all over. In my spare time I listen to songs that make me cry and lay in my bed and try to go to sleep. I'm so hopelessly lonely. I don't wanna die, i just want things to change. I wanna meet somebody. Meet some friends and have fun like I use to in highschool .I would really love to meet my soulmate. I'm tired of being unimportant. I wanna be cared for and have some one pay attention to me. Most of all I just need a friend. Just one at that. You can email me if you'd like to talk. I've always been an outcast but this is a little rediculous. I was popular in high school. Someone please help. I find myself so boy crazy these days all i can think about is guys. Feel free to email me
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Nearly 7 years has past since this post. It's as if I have stumbled accross an old diary stored away in an old shoe box. I just happened to come accross it online and now look back and laugh at how immature and pathetic I was. Even after all these years I would still agree that nothing hurts like losing your first love. Awww, puppy love. As a married woman, I can't say I miss those days, but I cherish the learning expirences gained from it all. In conclusion, teenage years can definatly be rough!
