Wolven

Thanks for this. A bit about my story: When we broke up she initially asked for a '3 week break' - I said ok but then a few days later I officially broke it off with her. It was totally the right thing since she said in her mind she saw it the 'same as a breakup' with the catch that we 'may' get back together after that time was done -- however, I'm not one to stay in limbo. Things were even more awkward since some money I lent her in the relationship caused stress and she didn't feel accountable for it. I initiated NC for a good month before I ran into her out on the town -- she was pale as a ghost and nervous (not that I was too comfortable either) -- however, I kept my cool and one of her first comments to me was that I was "stubborn" for not having called/emailed/contacted her in the past month (she wanted me to chase after her - imagine.). She wanted to go dinner, I declined and suggested that maybe coffee was more suitable - and that we'd talk the following week to set up a day - and she would contact me. 2 weeks went by NC - no contact from her -- and I run into her out at a club. I suggest to her that perhaps coffee isn't a good idea since we have nothing to really say to one another -- she comes back saying 'but the coffee could lead to 'sex'. She was implying becoming friends with benefits because she hadn't had any since we were together and she didn't see either of us dating anyone new for a while. I didn't bite. Next she upped the ante and said it could 'lead to us getting back together'. Again, I didn't bite. She also said she'd start paying back the $ she owes me. The following day she emails me saying that I was right about not going for coffee. We chat on IM for a bit and she goes on to say the sex comment was a 'joke' and that she 'never mentioned anything about getting back together'. It was sad to think she was attempting to change the prior day's events in order to salvage her ego. However, later she tried to explain the comments as 'missing me as a friend'. Well, I'm not one to transition from lover to friend -- we all know who benefits from that, and it's rarely ever the dumpee. It's one thing if they legitimately want to work on the issues that went wrong in the relationship and are mature enough to go through that process. It's a whole other when they say things to see how quickly you'll come running back.