littlemouse

Thank you, all of you. You see I've never had a boyfriend that wants to know every detail of your sexual past. I wasn't use to sharing that information with my best friends never mind my boyfriend, I felt embarrassed and I wanted to be his perfect woman, so I told a pack of lies so I would be that perfect woman. Truthfully deep down I knew it was wrong for him to make such a request and in the long run I'd be much happier if I stand up for myself, even if it means losing him. I can't ever imagine an oap stating that the secret of a happy marriage is maintaining an weight of 8 stone. I think I'm going to talk to him, and if he wants me to move out, it will break my heart, but I'll go and start a fresh.

Thank you so much for your reply. Part of me is wondering if he's done this in hope that I will break up with him, as in an email argument we had the other week he wrote "Why can't you just let me go, why do you keep holding onto this relationship?" I'm terrified of standing up to him (Not that I'm saying he abusive in anyway) I'm scared I'll lose him, and I hate feeling like that, I hate feeling like I'm under someone elses control as since I lied to him he's been pulling all the strings and it feels like I'm constantly waiting for the guy I fell in love with to come back. He promised if I did lose the weight he would be the guy he was when we first met. P.S. I never have cheated on him, wouldn't dream of it, I just lied about the things I got up to as a teenager.

I been going out with my boyfriend for nearly two years now, and the first year of our relationship was wonderful he was so kind and considerate. Unfortunately I messed up big time and told a few lies about my past (boyfriends I had slept with etc..) I finally admitted I had lied, but I stupidly did it in stages, were I would admit that I had slept with a guy and swear that was all I had lied about and then the week later I would admit to something else, so really I made the whole thing 10 times worst. For 9 months now things have not been right, he has lost all trust in me and I have been completely honest with him, but he doesn't believe me and lots of arguments have occurred due to this. Last week the arguments got that bad that he said he would like to think about us and tell me over the weekend whether he wants to be with me or not. The weekend has passed and his decision is: if I lose 3 stones in weight making me 8 stone he will finally forgive me, trust me again and has said that as soon as I hit 8 stone he will marry me. He told me the reason he chose this deal was because ever since I lied about my past he has been wanted to cheat on me and if I lost weight firstly: he wouldn't want to cheat on me anymore as he would have an attractive girlfriend already. Secondly: I would prove that I really do love him by doing something thats quite hard to do, thirdly: after I have lost all that weight I may not want him anymore so if I do stay with him afterwards he knows its what I truly want, and fourthly: as punishment for what I did. I'm not sure what to do, I did do wrong and I shouldn't of lied to him, but its hard to admit to your boyfriend that your not as lovely and as innocent as he thought, and that you've had a one night stand etc... Also I fully understand that these last 9 months have been very difficult for him, however its been difficult on me too, being accused of lying all the time, being screamed at, and still staying as pleasant and as nice as possible throughout. I love him so much and I believe he is my soulmate, but this deal has confused me, I'm shocked, for months he's been telling me that he wants to cheat on me and I have been trying so hard to be perfect for him, but I'm not good enough and obviously not thin enough. (Also its not like I'm massive, I a little chubby but I'm still of average size 14) Also he meantioned that when/if we get married he expects me to keep under size 10! Part of me wants to scream at him, whats the point of getting married if the love is not unconditional? I would love and adore him no matter what size he is! I want to stand up for myself, but I know I will lose him if I do. Thank you for any advice - I really appreciate your help.