drjones

Ocean123, I feel where you are coming from, I feel the same....I dont want to get burned again, I thought I had the one as well. I too thought I would be settled by now as well all my firends have married and settled down and I feel like i am the third wheel sometimes. I get scared thinking that I will get hurt again.

Hi Ocean, I know what exactly you mean, we were each others best friends and figured that what happened in my relationship that she found someone to share all those things we did with her new person. Its because we love that person is why we stick it out to be firends with them, we figure that they still need us like we need them, but we get so caught up in it all we dont heal and get over them. I guess they just healed faster than us. I dont know what the reason why things happen the way it does in situations like this, all I know it sucks and what do you do from here? I know you pick up your feet and move on, but it is easier than said.

Hey Guys, I have been a silent viewer here for the past year, had similar situations like most people here with breaks ups....typical found my best friend, love of my life ect, we were together for 2 years talked about marriage ect, then beginning of this year she wanted to end it, we still chatted on the phone everyday ect as firends. But then today it was getting to her and me I guess as well, b/c she wanted to move on and I was not ready, I guess thinking that we will get back together. I wanted to say to you all that are hopeing to get back with your ex, dont do what I did. Trying to hold on to hoep that soemthing will happen, I know its hard believe me, I have done it all, I read all the great advice from here i.e Superdave and the rest of the gang here......they are all right you have to move on and take care of "me", dont think that your ex will change, if they do great, but you need to move on otherwise you prolong your heart ache, believe me I did. I thought that things will change, but in fact they dont, your ex will move on and you will be stuck b/c they have ended it in their minds even though they chat with you and you think thats "getting back together" its not, Dont do NC for the sake of thinking they will get back with you...do it for you to get better. I feel like I have the wind knocked right out of me now, you dont want to feel like this. I know it hard, I feel alone, I just lost my best friend a person that knew everything about me, she knew even just by my tone in my voice when i say "hi" to her on the phone that something is not right. So when I tell you guys, I understand I do....I know most of the guys here know what I am talking about they speak from experience, listen to them, dont worry about trying to get back with them, b/c most likely you will not, and if you do, both people need to be fixed. I know that you all love your ex, I was deeply in love with mine too, you have to just let it go, which is hard to do, I am torn right now doing that. I constantly think of her and still feel even now that she will come back, but she will not and I have to move you on, like you all. I did not post anything during the year, thinking that my situation would be different, that I woudl get back with my ex and life would move on and I could be off this merry-go-around in dating but it did not work that way. I know some may say that you should be lucky that you can date...I am sure that they are right, but right now I am tried of this whole crap....when you think you have the right person, you dont know and some say that you do and you will know it, I thought I was right, I would have walked though the hell and back with what I thought was true. But it seems like it was not the case. I wish I knew why things happen the way they do but, it seems like there is no answer, I get angry and bitter over this. you would think being 32 it gets easier in life you still make mistakes and you hope that things will change I just feel right now that they dont and I dont know what to do about it. I feel like I iwll not find that person and I would be to scared to try again in fear of falling into this position again. If any of you can help put a perspective on this that would be great.