evening_light

If an ex came back would you consider going out with her again?

When an ex leaves, why would you take them back....

Can you trust them again? Are you willing to forget about the past? Are you still hurting? And if you take them back ( why?) can you forgive them...

Come on!!...after all the hurting why would you subject yourself to more pain...you're dignity is worth much more...

And in time you''ll feel much better and you''ll meet someone that deserves you!!

Start listening to your girlfriend when she talks.....

In life it's not always about ourself....if you care about her, do something...

Are you a happy person? if you are...try to make her happy!

lunatic, you see a person once and your afraid to tell that their not right for you??

Couple of things....because it's your first encounter, forget about her....you don't have to be mister gentleman ( sorry ladies)

Now because you have some class.....you will tell her that she is a very nice person but you don't have a "spark' or "butterflies" for her and that it was nice meeting her.....

Don't lead her on!!

Iggy5129, don't feel bad you're blessed with good fortune..

You're envious of your guy, but he's dealing with the real world...ok, so you don't have to worry about your future...( mom and dad are there for you)

Right now, your like an athlete making 10,000 dollars a year but with a 20 million dollar sponsorship....what's the motivation?

Even though your parents are financially supporting you, do something worthwhile, find a part time job ( and I mean, really look for one...) help your fellow students with their homework, cook a meal, etc...there are endless things you can do without money...and maybe in time you will start to feel good about yourself.

After a week I sent him a letter. no response

He said he would call me. He never did.

DO you think that maybe if I E-Mailed him instead of calling him he would feel less put on the spot and possibly repsond?

What if he doesn't respond? Now what? You'll be wondering if he got your e-mail, is his computer broken, did he delete it, did I say something wrong...etc ( you get my point)

The time he doesn't respond, you'll be a "wreck" ( a little more than you are right now ) Don't add more stress to your life...

I say try to forget about him ( I know, I know...) but you have to..

Zuport1, I'm impressed to the way you responded to the posts...

There is some light at the end of the tunnel....take some time to reflect and maybe with time and some self improvement, you guys can be together someday...

Good luck

E.L.

she is the love of my life

And yet because you were busy working, or whatever!!....couldn't even go for 1 hour....while she was recovering!!

Now your the victim??

I really want her back... I never told her I love her, even when I felt it

Don't you even dare tell her you "love her"...

Is there any advice on other stuff that I could do to just keep my mind off of her so I dont' do something stupid like talk to her before she's ready?

Sometimes when we say "nothing", we don't have to worry about what was "said".....

kimber271, sorry your hurting,

If you want to send a powerful message, send "nothing"...Your actions will speak louder than words...just leave

What would you tell him, that he doesn't know.....from what I'm reading, he has no respect for you....does he deserve an explanation?

Have no regret leaving this "bum" ( by the way, I've read your other thread)

Also I think deleting all emails, and shredding papers had a big factor in healing. No more torturing myself by re-reading emails over and over.

You are so right!

Many people keep them, for whatever reasons, in case, trying to keep some memories, but doing the shredding did accelerate your healing....good for you!!

I think we all need a group hug here...

Why would you apologise to her at this stage...she was a good friend, let it be...

What you are doing is instigating an apology to her, in response of an answer of why she left you....I still sense some resentment...

Your "ego" took a hit here...and now your upset because she broke off with you first....

From what I'm reading, it seems you were never serious with her, wanted the single life plus fringe benefits on the side...

I'd say, forget about her for now, what would you say in your letter that would convince her of your words...

I was thinking of sending a note with just a few words telling her my feelings haven't changed. If I don't get a response or am rejected, that will be it for me. I will be able to move on.

Then you said this...

I'm not healed enough yet, I know.

What if she doesn't answer?.....or she responds that's it's really over?

I don't think you need more turmoil right now....

My friend, what is a relationship......it's 50/50.....not 90/10 ( at best) like your doing....

She is draining you mentally, physically, that's not healthy....and your in the medical field!!!!

She has already pulled the trigger, now you want to see the bullet....??

Have you tried this strategy.....it's called "let her go"....forget all your pass analogies....it's not working..

You see, your ex is still there because of "guilt"....stop confessing your love, your admiration, her beauty ...etc...( your putting her on a pedestal )

Right now your "broken heart" is doing all the "talking" instead of your "head" doing all the "listening"

How are you doing my friend?

Sorry about all the hurt your experiencing....couple of questions...

Are you afraid of losing her? or are you afraid of being alone?

At one time in my life I said the same thing you said "I will never find any one like her"....man was I wrong...once you've healed and youre in acceptance, you'll find someone that will love YOU for who you are....doesn't mean she's a bad person, just that she's not ready for you...

You are about to give that Viagra-reject the ride of his life. If you want that goofy loser back, this is the way to do it. But, I strongly suggest you do this just for a piece of mind and drop him like a hot patato

And your point is ??

StephenP59 you're still in the "resistance stage".....you need to let go, I know, easier said than done.....

Right now you're hurting, that's understandable, but you can't "weep" all your life....you have to move on..

You're saying to yourself "I will never meet anybody like her"....Why would you? Is she with you right now? Is she in your arms? Is she making you happy? You know the answer to all those questions.....

Your heart deserves someone that will appreciate YOU for who you are...start letting go today and the healing will start...

I've practically been single my whole life until my ex.

SpeedingCars, in a couple of years, you'll be saying " what was I thinking"..

We, most of us, at one time , experienced a broken heart, part of life, but if you don't venture on, how can you appreciate life...

You're young, have fun, don't take your life too serious, finish school, let faith guide you....

found myself trying to add things to my myspace to make him jealous and make him see that I'm happy

Why would you make him "jealous" when you have a new guy and your happy??

I woudn't put anything on, that in the future I would regret!!

So what your telling me, is that your putting your life on status quo, "on hold"

until she decides that you guys should be a couple again....why?

While your here worrying , driving yourself insane, she may be having the time of her life..... Ok, at first she told you she missed you, but lately, she is revealing the true HER.

What would be your next move if she tells you that it’s really over ( and I mean really over..)

(the one in question is link removed) It says we are both in a relationship wth each other and are praticial married. She has commented nurmerous times that she doesn't want to change it (to single)for it will cause rumors and stuff to happen, and that we should just leave it saying we are in a relationship.

Don't read between the lines on this one...she just doesn't want to admit she single, this way she doesn't get hounded....

You do have strength??, correct me if I'm wrong, but I've noticed that slowly but surely, I'm sensing a progression in you...you're starting to realise a few things..

a) she's not into you ( but your crazy about her)

b) you love her ( but she wants you as a friend)

What can you do right now...start detaching from her, go cold turkey, NO CONTACT....make her miss you, make her see what she would be missing...

you're making her life very easy...she calls( you answer)...she e-mails( you jump)....set some bounderies for yourself and she'll respect you...

is it going to be hard, yes!! ( but the only person who can muster that inner strength is YOU ), right now what have you got to lose....you already lost her as a "girlfriend"

Like Blender said..." you don't want to be her buddy"...right??

I'm going to HARP at you until you go NO CONTACT....so prove to yourself, not ME, that YOU have the courage...

She told me yesterday that she has all her weekends planed so that she doesn't have to be alone here since she will be sad when she gets back here.

Let me guess? You're not part of her plans!! My friend she has told you in every which way possible, that she will be your "friend" not girlfriend...

Stop torturing yourself, you don't sleep, problably don't eat well either, give her some loose, let her be on her own for a while....

Leave her alone, I know you love her, but you also love your parents and you don't hold their hand when you go out with them either, right?

I may be blunt here, but your showing her that your dependant, clingy, sad person...if you want her to start appreciating you as a "boyfriend type of guy", show her the independent, mature, respectful, proud man you are!!

Couple of questions for you....

Who initiates the phone contact? Does she tell you to call her? or do you tell her you'll call her?

Also, are far away is she going to college and when is she coming back to your town?

Welcome to ENO, TijuanaJones

Not to sound rude but could you copy/paste your post and put it in a "thread"

It will make it easier to answer your questions without interfering with thefarewellnote's post

Thanks

E.L.