Hi my name is David. My wife and I have been together for seven years, and we have a son about to turn five.
Over the years I have been too controlling of her, and she has put in much work on the relationship, changing and growing without much response from me.
About two months ago she was in so much pain she decided we should divorce. We tried some counseling but it just wasn't doing it for her.
We separated and are living in separate apartments now. All ties are not cut, and we haven't filed for divorce, but she still sees that as the eventual outcome of all this.
I have expressed to her how much I love her, and how the slap in the face of losing her has opened my eyes to my wrongs and how I need to change, but now she doesn't trust me enough to let me into her life to show those changes, and thoughts of reconciliation are too painful for her.
I really feel that the key here is for here to somehow understand I love her with every fiber of my being, am totally open to change, and have actually come to love her more seeing her being strong and independent and living her own life, but she just can't trust what I say, and I don't know how to facilitate a change in the situation, or a reconciliation.
I have gotten therapy, and read alot of books on the subject, but nothing seems to be helping, she is slipping further and further away from me, and I don't know what to do.
I know she still loves me, but she has walled up her emotions concerning me, and refuses to address them because it is too painful for her. I've done the best I can to be there for her and be supportive, as she has never lived on her own, but I've made some slip ups too, and a few slip ups seem to undo all the good I've done.
I'm really at the end of my rope here, and any advice will be appreciated.
Thanks
David
