nectarine

Thank you guys. I know he tells me that his wife killed his love but maybe he is just kidding himself. He hasn't really supported her very much. Her family were there for her and he was feeling very guilty about her ending up in the mental hospital. However he doesn't believe she left him because of mental difficulties and so is worried to trust her again and get back into his marriage. Do you think if i weren't around, he would be open to addressing his marriage? and do you think because he can't trust women is why he isn't committing to me and not because he doesn't love me. In fairness he hasn't said this to me but he has said that he cares deeply for me. I was an affair to start with and maybe i was wrong in the first place to tell him i was around for him when he first returned to his wife. Maybe i didn't give him the space to truly address is marriage. It helps to talk to you guys and sort it all out in my head. Any further comments, all greatfully received for me to mull over and consider. Thank you all. Nectarine.

I've been going out with my partner/boyfriend for two and a half years. We first got together when he and his wife were having difficulties but he went back to her, after she pleaded with him to. However I told him I would wait for him no matter how long it took. He and his wife continued a difficult time (she had moved out of the marital home but they still had a kind of relationship going on) My boyfriend tried to wait for her to sort herself out (it turns out she was going through some mental difficulties) but we got back together and 5 months later he asked his wife for a divorce, to which she agreed. However, two weeks after this, she had a mental breakdown. He was very very torn but she had hurt him so much, he couldn't go back to her and he chose to stay with me. I had only ever been there for him, trying to help him through all his difficulties! My problem is this. We get on well. He is 16 years older but very young in his ways. He can't commit to me and he has told me this on numerous occasions. I know that he sees his wife every Saturday afternoon when they take out their three grandchildren. It is purely on a friendly basis and one that they continue for the sake of the grandchildren. But he still hasn't divorced her. He told me that he doesn't want to send her back into the mental hospital. Also their daughter (mother of grandchildren) is dead against our relationship. He has told me he has very deep feelings for me but am I hoping for me in vain. What is going on do you think? Should i break things off with him? Maybe he was rebounding with me and i won't ever get him to divorce his wife and commit to me, what do you think???? Nectarine.