sho0

Thank you all for the responses. We've been talking back and forth, but IDK... I don't foresee a change in him now. He keeps getting offensive even though I'm not trying to put him on the spot and then he starts calling me names and "making fun" of me for living with my parents (which I chose to do because I don't want to work full time to support myself AND go to college.). I can't get through to him at all, and he just responds in an irrational immature manner. I got upset after this then he said "People like me get jealous easily of people who are much more fortunate." I tried to compromise by playing the game with him again, and it was enjoyable for once. We played for two days.. But now he shows no interest in playing together and tells me he's too busy... and when I call he always says he's busy (as you can hear things exploding and dying in the background, lol). He says he is playing to catch up with the other members in the guild. He thinks that when we sit together watching a movie, it's the same thing as if he were 5 feet away on a video game... and won't get off of that idea. though lately it's kind of that way... We'll sit together to watch a movie and he doesn't want me "on" him or anything. I asked him if he was still attracted to me and he totally freaked out that I'd even ask such a thing. ChicagoGal - yeah, I think you nailed this one. Sounds similar. I don't think he's manipulative at all, but maybe ignorant. I can't imagine another female putting up with his behavior. Maybe that's why all of his past girlfriends cheated on him. And the "me" attitude.. that sounds so much like him! The first time we broke up I blamed myself and it was miserable. I know this time around it is definitely not my fault because I've tried to be lenient and really nice... I cleaned his house for him not too long ago thinking that after work he'd maybe sit down with me and appreciate it. He did thank + hug me... then went on his way to the computer. Oh and he also said "You shouldn't have cleaned... now I don't have an excuse to get off of the game." Then again, it could be considered my fault for doing too much for him. Like others have said, it seems like he's taking me for granted. I'm starting now to lose my feelings for him... and I've even become self conscious around him? I thought that was weird... I was at his house the other night and the next morning when I woke up I didn't want him to look at me until I was dressed? LOL. Again, I can't get through to him and communication is a key thing for relationships, so this isn't likely to work... breaking up is easier said than done I'm thinking of maybe showing him my post on here since that way he can't really interrupt me the way he normally would in his bouts of aggressive putdowns. Just so he can see the situation from my point of view without interruption. Not sure... IDK if he'd flame the message board Thanks again for all of your help.

wow, fast replies...I thought it'd take a couple days... Thank you for taking your time to read + respond. I'm going to try to talk to him about it again. If he blows me off then I'll... somehow manage to dump him Would it be wrong to stay with him until I find someone else? LOL! I'm with him because, well, usually I really enjoy spending time with him, but sometimes he gets this way. I read something from Men are From Mars Women Are From Venus that makes sense... that maybe he just wants some time for himself and that I should leave him alone. ChicagoGal -- thank you for sharing your story and advice... I keep re-reading it and it's definitely something to consider. Especially your thought on us being at different stages. I've also considered that maybe he is just too comfortable in the relationship? Btw... He quit that job awhile ago, but as for the females who convinced him -- I know they did because I, unfortunately, spied on him (& them). It's funny he would listen especially since one was cheating on her fiance and it was that particular female that started it... my suspicions as to why is based on an "endowment" contest the males had in which he supposedly won -sigh-. (Walmart, Nightshift. -shakes head-) Anyways, that part is over, except for some of my lingering jealousies (long story)... what a mess it was. I do agree that his priorities are a little messed up and that he is immature. I've talked to him about that before and he told me that I was more immature and naive than he is because I "still live with mommy and daddy" It's been a long time since I brought that up, but yeah... And for the record, I like living with my family. I'm only 19. I thank you all for your input. I'll try to talk to him when I get the guts to sometime tonight. Oh, and as for the tuition... I have a scholarship that pays 100% of my tuition (high gpa), so I figured he could use the money. I have a couple jobs. I don't like the idea of taking out loans because then you have to pay it back + some. I'm letting him pay this back whenever, if ever. It wouldn't be too big of a loss to me since there is nothing materialistic that I want. I just bought my dream car so I'm good for awhile. He may not be my husband, but I really care about him. His family doesn't approve of college and so they wouldn't help him out. He's too lazy to fill out a Financial Aid Form... -shakes head-

This may be a really immature topic, but I thought I'd give it a shot. Some background... I've been in my first relationship for a couple of years now... and things have gone well until March (except for a thing in December where he wanted to spend christmas alone playing his videogames instead of spending it with me). Things were really hectic for him around the Feb-March timeframe because he lost his job and the transmission in his car went... all kinds of financial messes. He found a new job where a group of females convinced him to breakup with me. (I'm not positive of why they did such a thing. I don't know them and never did anything to them.) He said some horrible things about and to me, but I forgave him and took him back a week or two later when he changed his mind. the past few months have been fine up until a couple weeks ago. Last year he got a computer game that we planned on playing together... however he starting telling me how bad I was at playing and such so I grew to hate that particular game. We've had arguments in the past about the game because when he invites me over he's on it and I'm stuck watching him play it from the couch. his television doesn't work so I don't have any other options. I'd rather not drive all the way back home because he lives kind of far (I usually spend the night.). He doesn't get off of it when I ask him to, instead he says: "Why? So I can sit by you and be bored with you?" or he tells me that I'm ridiculous for being jealous of a game. So I'm not really sure what to do. He does go on breaks... like he probably hasn't played the game for three months or so, but he just picked it up again. Here's where I got heated up... Earlier this week he suggested that we go out to the movies. Later he found out that he couldn't afford to go because he still had to pay his phone bill... Instead he invited me over, which is just fine. Well, when I got there he was installing the -newly bought- expansion to the game. I don't mean to sound shallow... It isn't the movie that I'm upset about. It's that he has other priorities, such as a phone bill, but he just spent $50 on a game. Not only that, but he told me he wanted to go to college really badly, but he was upset that he couldn't afford it. Well, I paid the tuition for him and gave him that opportunity... but I did not buy his books. Instead he's spending his money on a game. I feel like I'm going to regret paying for his schooling. I don't know... Am I just being unreasonable? So anyway, I was pissed off (but I didn't let him know I was) so I told him I was going to take a walk. About an hour later I was returning back feeling 100x better, when I see him storming out of the house and up to me. He was PO-ed because I forgot my cell phone and he saw an ambulance come into the neighborhood... He also said something like "I was worried sick. You can't walk ten minutes without panting, I don't know how you managed an hour" (which really insulted me since I ride my bike 5 miles a day, and that night I walked three... I'm not out of shape... ... He's a foot taller than I am or more so when he walks fast I have to sort of jog to keep up so I think that's where he got it from? And... there was one time I asked him to take a walk with me... but he ended up walking 20-40 feet ahead of me.) anyways... I tried to shrug off his attitude and we went inside. When we got inside he kept glaring at me, so I asked him why he was throwing such a fit? and that it was an accident that I forgot my cell phone. I also apologized for even forgetting it. He told me to drop it but... I persisted because his negativity was really bringing me down and I wanted to make it better. He then started yelling at me and said something like: "I don't want to hear your tales of woe!" which, I don't quite understand... I was just asking him why he was so angry with me. He then said he would feel better in the morning and went to sleep. I stayed up all night thinking... which is never a good thing because it makes me more angry or upset. Because he thinks I blow things out of proportion, he told me I shouldn't talk to my friends about my problems. which seems to make me break down really easily... and apparently I can't go to him either because he doesn't want to hear it... which leads me to say I really don't know why I'm posting this, I just have to get this off of my chest and have someone listen to me. The other night, after he turned off the game, he called me to say Goodnight. I hadn't heard from him in two days (that's another thing... If I call him he's always "busy" playing the game so I'm not really allowed to.). He then said "I love you" before hanging up and I basically denied it... so now he isn't talking to me at all... I totally regret that. I called him today (god forbid..) because I was going to buy him a pair of pants, but he was in no mood for speaking to me. -sigh- I don't know what to do. I remember in March, before he broke up with me, I tried to get him to compromise over something (can't remember what) and he said that he doesn't compromise for anyone. I guess it's pointless maybe to let the relationship last any longer? I'm pretty upset by this and don't really want to end it, but I feel like I need to. I'm getting bored with his behavior and his lack of motivation. I don't feel completely satisfied, as if I'm there only for his convenience. I wish I knew how he felt, but he gets so angry while trying to discuss something simple with me. Does anyone have suggestions for bringing problems up without sounding too accusing? Let me know, am I over reacting? EDIT: holy crap that was long XD Sorry.