I'm not much different than everyone else. Everyone has problems in their life, but mine seems different. My life was great all my years before high school. During high school everything went downhill, i lost all my friends, i become depressed (and i'm not now, i'm ok until i get lonely) and I havent had but like two girlfriends with whom my relationships didn't last. I'm jsut not the charismatic, hilarious person i used to be. Everyday i go around feelign all blank inside, no emotions. I really don't have a life. Okay that is not my problem tho. I graduated this year and now I'm REALLY lonely! Here's the main part of my message:
You do not understand how this city I live in is. It used to be a city now it is poor and run down town. I live in a county where this is the most populated city in it. (So I'm making a point that tehre is nowhere to go in like 70 miles... no joke, so I'm not wasting gas giong somewhere else to do stuff.) The problem is, there is nothing to do in this town!! The only attraction here is a WALMART. The only thing people CAN do for fun is hang out in the parking lot how pathetic. Here's the kicker. You can imagine in a town like this, there is nothign but a bunch of druggies and alcoholics. This is true. I'm religious (not very religious, I just have my simple few boundaries, like no smoking, no drinking, no killing, etc.) Well all my high school life all everyone had done for fun was get drunk and smoke weed. I'm not lying. If you want i can post link removed links of people i know who can tell you the same thing about this town and i can post an OVERWHELMING number of links of people who are posting comments each day about parties they have each week. TO this day, they still continue to have at LEAST three parties each week and everyone stays wasted all the time. That is the majority of people my age here. I am so depressed because i don't have a life here. I really CANT have a life here. Now it seems I've become so ill that even when i go new places, people don't seem attracted to me, instead I am labeled a nerd and a no-life and its easy to tell but I CANT HELP IT!! All i want is some friends and to be able to develop my personality and charisma back again so i can go back to enjoying life. Im 18 and depressed. I don't know how to handle this. Confidence is something I have but i get so down because I get so lonely. I haven't done or experienced much at all in my life and im like lightyears behing everyone in the US. please help me
