yul

Hey thanks for your replies! I think I will be able to find some help with you guys, by being able to explain my thoughts and get them cleared up ;-) The fact is that I am the "nice guy" type of person. I care a lot about women and their feelings. So much that it has made my life a bit hard in the aspect that women usually don't go for nice guys. I do not place importance in knowing the person all that much but do genuinely pay attention to their feelings... I need to do some more reading and will get back to you. Sex is probably not my problem rather than romance and passion.

Hey thanks! the more I read, the more I am realising that I place a lot of importance on having a womans attention and affection. So much that it can make me feel impatient and that can actually scare some women away. I need to be more patient, less anxious. But I do also place some importance in knowing ech other but clearly not as high as women would.

I forgot to add that one main motivations behind this is that I really enjoy getting a womans attention. I doesnt have to be sexual but any kind of attention I find is very flattering for the EGO especially when it gets sexual. It's the summum of success in my terms I guess... How big of a problem is that?

Hi, I am thinkning about getting counseling. The only reason is that it is not possible to fulfill my needs so far without it being dangerous. I just can't understand how it could be wrong to want to get sexual on a regular basis. Couples do it regularly? The only difference is I don't care if I don't know the person I'm with. Maybe thats being deviant I don't know. Maybe I should make a man of myself and place an ad in those online classifieds. Maybe it would help meet my needs, should I be diagnosed as being "normal".

Hello, this is my first post. I am a 31 y/o male having some problems dealing with life and sex. I am 5 years clean from cocaine too. My need for lust and sexual encounters has always been very high from a young age. I masturbate daily and get horny at the sight of many women. I have been know for spending a lot of time looking for casual sexual encounters days an nights, maybe once a week, in bars, streets, parks etc, especially in my drug years. But I still go out by myself trying to get lust and sex at least once a week. I do not have great needs in terms of sex but usually, some kissing mutual masturbation could be enough ;-) But it rarely happens so I get more frustrated. As an ex cocaine addict, sex was one of my main motivations. You could meet very needy women and have a good time with them without complications. They were VERY horny too. Now, I am off drugs but still feel this strong need for connection and relief. I recently broke off a 7 year relationship that started out well in terms of sex and felt relatively satisfied even in the end with a frequency of once a week or so. So now we broke up, and I want to have sex a lot but I don't want to go back to lurking the bars, doing drugs just to get with needy women. My high sex drive is impairing my ability to relate with the regular women I should be with. Women eventually sense that and dont like it obviously. There is a certain anxiety that builds up and kills my attempt at being a gentleman... I am capable of being patient but the fact is that on a weekly basis, I go on a binge hoping to get relief. I find women incredibly sexy and want them to want me too but they are not as needy as I am. I wonder if this ability to control the sexual urge makes the difference between a man and a wanker. Thanks