New to the forum but have used it for advice throughout the last year and need some help.
Backround:
Split with my ex of 3yrs January 2005. Split on good terms and tried the whole being friends thing. Didn't work out as I wanted her back so bad so June last year agreed it was best for No Contact.
That worked. As far as I'm concerned I've moved on but would like to remain friends as we are in the same social circles. (Hasn't been a problem the last year as she's been at uni)
Anyway she broke contact at xmas just a small card and a brief hello, how's it all going letter. sent a few brief txt messages and discovered she was uncertain about future contact so I left it at no contact again.
Anyway beginning of March I contacted her to see how see was doing on the basis that if we had absolutely no contact then we could never be friends. Again couple of short txt messages and all's ok.
Two weeks later I get a txt to see how I'm doing and next thing she's mentioning having to stay in hospital and have some tests. I kept it brief as I didn't want to get to involved with it.
So bumped into her about a week later and we caught up. No real akwardness so all good. I explained about keeping my txts brief when she mentioned the hospital as I thought she wanted to use me as someone to talk to emotionally. She confirmed this and understood when I said we are not at that stage as friends anymore.
Anyway we've had occasional contact since every week or so. All by txt messages. Just small talk really about work, going out, etc.
Heres my problem... Her 21st Birthday is coming up this month and I'm in a dilemma. If we had still been no contact then no problem no card no txt nothing. But as we now have contact can't do that or looks like I've forgotten or ignored it.
Now Do I send a txt or a card or do something else and what should it say? (PS I'd prefer to send a card)
Bearing in mind I am still not clear of her intentions:
1) She broke contact with me at xmas still unsure of her emotions
2) She has tried to talk to me about her personal problems because she cannot open up to others.
3) She finishes uni this year and will be moving back home for good come the summer.
Don't get me wrong I still want to be friends but just weary that it may all be leading somewhere on her part and I just don't want to go down that route.
So how do I send a genuine birthday wish as a friend without it being misinterpretted as anything else.
Any toughts will be much appreciated.
Thanks
