Things are getting to the point where i dont know what to do anymore. I have been with my gf for a little over two years. I love her dearly and would never do anything to harm her. She says she feels the same way about me too, but my own jealousy is getting to me. badly. I hate the fact that i am jealous and have done everything to stop it. I have spoken to her about it, and that calms things down a bit, but soon enough, they come back, for one reason or another. The problem is, this isnt normal jealousy. She has male friends, I know them and am friends with them, thats fine, but other males who i feel threatened by, it goes far beyond jealousy. I find myself wanting to see them dead, i feel like they are going to take her from me, and I want to end their existence for doing so.
Even something as innocent as meeting someone she looks up to. She went to a convention this past few days and met come comic artists she really liked. she took pictures with them. when she showed them to me, i wasnt happy she got to meet some artists she looks up to (she is an artist herself), but all i could think about is how badly i wanted to kill them. how badly i wanted to erase their existence. Make them suffer for taking her affections away.
Know i would never lay a hand on my gf. i have never thought about physically touching her in an unappropriate way, these feelings are only directed at other guys i feel threatened by. And its not something i like to feel. I want these thoughts gone.
