OK here goes, need some advice but don't know if I'm going mad or what I even need advice about!
I've been with partner for 13 years and we have a 12 year old son and 10 year old son with ASD.
Back story - Partner has been quite verbally abusive to me over the years and we split up for a while 2 years ago, stupidly we got back together and things were generally better.
My ASD son is having complete meltdowns at the moment and we're really struggling with him.
Partner doesn't help, sits away from us all the time upstairs which in turn causes my son to be more angry at him because he's "never there" , my son is destroying things in the house and just completely making things horrible at home, he keeps spitting and hitting ect. I'm having to deal with all this on my own and try and control the situation without losing my own temper.
When son lashes out Partner will have a go at me, blames me for the way son is call me names says its all my fault and even threatened to punch me if I didn't get son to stop - never has hit me but has got in my face a few times threatening to ect.
But the thing is an hour or so later Partner will act normal asking if I'm ok acting like nothing has been said and it's as if I'm the one who has the problem, he then tries speaking to son and son will tell him to go away, it's catch 22 because he doesn't spend time with us. He literally comes in from work, goes upstairs, comes down for 1 minute to get his dinner then back upstairs until we're all in bed. Every day.
Just generally don't know what to do anymore - I don't know if I'm going mad, I am definitely depressed very much so.
By the way ASD son can be the most loving little boy 90 percent of the time its usually when something happens which he has no control over(serving a dinner he doesn't like anymore, not going to the park because its raining ect)
I do have my parents so I'm not completely alone but feel like I'm on my own in this house.