Okay, here's the deal. I need advice from someone outside my group of friends and family, who are fed up with hearing this and have given me every piece of advice imaginable.
My ex and I were together for almost four years. During that time, I made a lot of mistakes. I was immature and cheated on her emotionally several times. Never physically and I know that emotional cheating is just as bad, but I just needed to clear that up. She loved me more than life itself and took me back every single time she found out about what was going on.
Last June we broke up mutually because we were both very unhappy. I have taken this time to really focus on myself and making myself a healthier and happier person. But I love her. She is the only person I want to be with.
I know that it sounds like a classic case of immaturity wanting what they lost. But that is not the case. Its just the opposite. I learned a valuable lesson when she left. I opened my eyes and saw that the grass was not greener on the other side. That the greenest grass I ever had was right in front of me. I miss her terribly. She was my best friend, my girlfriend, my soulmate, everything.
She is with someone else right now, but still makes it abundantly clear that I am the love of her life. She has told me that she misses me and loves me and knows that we will be together again one day, she just doesn't know when. She tells me that she is going to break up with the other person she is with now, but never does. I think that when she comes to me with these things, I am so happy that I jump all over it and get all excited and start making plans and that scares her because she always backs off and changes her mind.
She told me that she is not ready to be with me again. I understand that, what I don't understand is if you are still so in love with someone, how can you be with someone else? This other person does not have her full heart or soul. Why is she settling when she knows that her and I will be together again?
We have instated the no contact rule several times and for whatever reason always start talking again. Its like its pure torture for us to go a week without talking. I know that I should remain strong because she always misses me so much when we aren't talking.
So, what do I do?
