2Bhappy

thanks for the help and advice, i'm sure all this will get better, still looking for more advice if anyone has it

maybe if it's not coming from me, she'll understand better, like if someone else talks to her about all of this.

thanks k8tie, i feel like she is too dependent on me also. I feel like she doesn't have the greatest of parents, they're divorced and the mother drinks, father is remarried, and yes, guys have mistreated her in the past.....i love this girl more than she will ever know, all i want is for her to know that, me breaking up with her is not an option, i know this problem can be fixed, its just a matter of communicating to her so she understands.

i understand what yall are saying, but to me it seems like it's just not that simple, i know this kind of thing is'nt just going to change overnight or anything, its just that we do everything together, i mean everything. before i met her, i always hung out with my friends, my friends and i always seemed to have a good time, i miss that. if i try to talk to her about it, she just doesn't seem to understand what i'm trying to say. i feel like she's not respecting my feelings and what i want. she somehow seems to always turn things around and make it seem like i'm being selfish. maybe this example will explain it: say i wanted to go do something with just my friends, i will tell her and she will say, "can i go too", she never seems to think that maybe i might want it to be just me and my friends, in my book thats kind of inconsiderate if i could somehow communicate to her in a way that she would just understand without getting defensive or hurt.

First off a little background: I am a 20 year old college student and my girlfriend is 19 and entering college soon. We have been dating for about a year now and everything has been awesome with our relationship until recently. i feel like i'm being smothered. she says i'm allowed to hang out with my friends but i can tell she doesn't want me to. She is constantly cutting everyone of my friends down and tells me how stupid they are. if i would like to do something that doesn't involve her she tried to make me feel bad about doing it, and i end up not doing it. i haven't minded being under her "control" because i kind of liked it in the beginning because she is my first girlfriend. I know if i try to talk to her about giving me a little space she will take it completely the wrong way and we will both end up crying our eyes out because she will end up hurt. i dont know if i have a communication problem or if its just that she knows where i'm going when i try to talk abou things like this and gets defensive to maintain control....... basically i need to know the best way to go about communicating with her and letting her know how i feel and that i will always be there for her and continue to love her with all of my heart......i also know that this relationship will continue to go downhill of i do not fix this problem because it kind of makes me resent her when she controls me....any help will be appreciated.