You... I've tried so hard to understand why you treated me so coldly. Why you kept me in tears and afraid. Why you let me believe that I was the one who brought out your anger. Why you used back handed compliments. Why you let me fall to pieces and never once offered me a hand when you knocked me down with your words. I know now why all of the above. You are an abuser. You leave your bruises on the inside. You know you have a problem. You never loved me or appreciated me. You led me to the "promised land" only to break down the walls to hell instead. I will not waste one more moment of my life pondering your actions anymore. What you've done is inexcusable. I know I reacted emotionally at the end, but with your trickle of love you gave me, it drove me mad. If I was crazy, you made me that way. Backed me into corners and made me feel like the act of wanting to discuss our life together was such a terrible thing. It's because that was a dream that I was living. How could I lose someone I never even had? I showed up for our relationship. You always found a way to be conveniently absent and uninvolved or uninterested. Most people can split amicably and just deal with the pain and move on, but you... You walked away unscathed and with much more of me than I ever should've given you. Now I have to learn how to be me again. How to trust again and how to love someone else again. You stole my identity by making me question everything I did. It was never good enough for you. You always found something wrong. Always. You never celebrated me or us. Again, because you were absent. Get help. Thanks for passing the scar of PTSD onto me now. Now I have to deal with flashbacks and paranoia. Because of what you have bestowed upon me now, I have learned more about you. I felt sorry for you and would've stood by your side when you were being healed and going through therapy. Now I have your social disorder and not because of the horrors of war, but the horrors of YOU. I'm sorry I have nothing more nice to say, but you created this demon inside of me that I need to exorcise. I will heal from this in time and will still be a good person as I always was to you. Because even though I now bear your cross, I have the presence of mind to know what it is. You, on the other hand will always abuse and use your personal issues as your excuse. There isn't a reason to treat someone who trusts and loves you the way you treated me. Problems or not. There is right and wrong. Real men don't demean their women. Real men don't give up the way you did so very easily. Stay out of my life. You've done quite enough.