Did I strike out or what...?

[Fisch]

Ok so I met this girl at a party and talked her up. She approached me later on at the party to continue the conversation and even got real close at one point. At the end of the party I asked for her number and she gave it. I texted her during the week asked if she was coming to a party that weekend. She said maybe.

 

At the party her friend told me that she was coming. She did and we talked all night, things seemed to be going pretty well, I met some of her friends and she met some of mine. We talked about ourselves and all of that, the usual exchange of bibliographic info. I left for a moment and came back and she said she was going home with her friends, she touched my hand while saying goodbye sorta seemed like she didnt know what to do or something...?

 

Anyway, I told her I would call her during the week, and she said ok. I thought that the night went really well. I was a bit drunk later that night and texted her "G'night Beautiful" which I think maybe was a mistake lol, seemed like a good thing to do at the time. I am thinking maybe I scared her off or something. I also texted her the next day about a football game, she did not respond to either of these, although she seems to be rather slow at answering text messages. On tuesday I called and left a message that sort of said call me if you get this.

 

She has not called. Errr I know it could be some coincidence but does it sound like I have struck out or what? It sort of has me in a bad mood today. I suppose I should try and talk to her once more, just to be sure lol. What do you guys think? Any advice?

[Stinkweed]

To me it sounds like she only wanted to be friends with you... So don't think you "scared her away". It's no big loss, unless you think you would've wanted to be friends with her as well. If you do (but be honest to yourself... Will you be content with just a friendship?), then send her a message apologizing or something... I dunno, I shouldn't be really giving people advice about how to deal with people when I myself am such a social *beep* up...

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Maybe she's just wondering why you don't use your telephone to *speak* to her, I know if I were her that's exactly what I would be wondering. Texting isn't exactly a sexy or personal way to ask someone for a date.

[Stinkweed]

AND,

Maybe she's just wondering why you don't use your telephone to *speak* to her

 

that too...

[coollady1957]

I think if you are sure you are texting and calling the right number and she has not responded yet,,, then I wouldn't call or text anymore. That is just my opinion on what I would do if it were me.

[coollady1957]

On tuesday I called and left a message that sort of said call me if you get this.

 

 

He did say that he called and left a message, so she obviously didn't answer.

[Stinkweed]

He did say that he called and left a message, so she obviously didn't answer.

 

Whoops... Sorry, I overlooked that one. In that case, Fisch, I still think you should forget about her. It's her loss. Good luck.

[Memorex12]

Why do girls do that, I just don't understand it.. it seems like she just kind of led him on.

[coollady1957]

Why do girls do that, I just don't understand it.. it seems like she just kind of led him on.

 

 

Kind of sounds like it. However, some guys as well as girls do that same thing.

[Clementine orange]

1.) What woman doesn't want to be called beautiful? OK, maybe if it's insincere. But one can say "good night beautful" in a kind of cocky, flirty way (which I'm guessing you were going for), the girl should just laugh if off as a flirty guy thing and think "yeah I am beautiful".

2.) Coming on too strong (by dishing out the compliments too early) can scare a woman off.

3.) Women have to be careful - they are afraid of guys that might "gloam" onto them and become a nuisense. Since she is "beautiful" then no doubt this has happened before.

4.) maybe she doesn't know how to respond to "good night beautiful" - she is shy, a little awkward perhaps. I mean, what are you supposed to say back to this?

5.) Text messages are dangerous. Easily misread. you 20 somethings - how about a phone call already, then you can figure out the mood before bringing in the big guns

6.) You are reading too much into this. You texted her on tuesday and she hasn't written back yet - it's only wednesday. Maybe she is busy. Maybe she hates text messaging, maybe her dog just died, maybe she didn't get the TM, maybe she thought it was someone else

7.) Maybe she is a flirt and leads men on for attention like some other poster said. Get a few drinks, fun party, it's all about the attention for some women - (ever notice the prettier they are, the more attention they seem to need). It's a big game - guys play along.

 

As you can see, there are too many variables here to decipher what's going on. Dont panic - it may not be over yet. Be cool. If it goes south then what have you really lost?

[Clementine orange]

Friends. Another poster said "maybe she just wants to be friends". Why didn't she make that fact plain all along? Keeping her options open perhaps?

[lost_status]

I think you should just stop txting her, if she wants to get in touch she knows how to. I wouldnt really waste too much time, there are plently of girls out there.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

If you like her you should make the effort to phone her and get ahold of her. If you must leave a message, say something difinitive that needs a response. Don't just say "I just called to say 'Hey.'". If you don't like her leave it at what you have, honestly you haven't put forth that much effort, and yes she may not be interested, or then again, she may think you're not. You're the one who is motivated to make something happen between the two of you...or not. She will most likely drift happily along to someone who makes more of an effort to let her know he'd like to see her.

 

And once again, don't text her again. It's too casual, and impersonal.

[Fisch]

Lol ok, I guess I was unclear. I CALLED her on Tuesday, not texted. I left a voicemail, and she has not responded. I was DRUNK when I sent the G'night Beautiful, so yea I was going for something that I thought was a good idea at the time. Also, I am pretty sure she didnt just want to be friends. Why would you talk to someone all night who asked for your number and asked and who you asked of personal information and flirted. I dunno how much more direct you can really be without coming on kind of strong? I feel like there is a chance I am overreacting, but at the same time I am expecting the worst because I am in a crappy mood. But uhhh I guess some people really wouldnt say anything if they wanted to send a signal, which would be rather inconvenient... sigh! thanks for the responses. Oh and I did leave a message that said call me if you get this, I thought I would work my way up from texting lol.

[Fisch]

Ok, the rule of thumb seems to be give it at least 2 phone calls. So I guess I will wait a day or two or something and try one more time, because I really dont know what happened, and if she doesnt return it Ill be pretty sure that she is avoiding me. Plenty of fishies in the sea

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

There's plenty of fishies for girls too

 

Keep in mind that a lot of girls get a lot of drunk dialed, late night calls from guys who have no intention of asking them to go on a date. She may be simply weeding you out, wondering if you're just looking for a last minute booty call. If you put yourself in her place, you can't really blame her.

[Fisch]

Yea, Im not "blaming". I am just disappointed. I will investigate the matter lol. My last relationship ended in a way that sort of hit my self esteem, so maybe I am still pretty sensitive.

[coollady1957]

Lol ok, I guess I was unclear. I CALLED her on Tuesday, not texted. I left a voicemail, and she has not responded. .

 

 

No you weren't , it was clear that you had called her on Tuesday and not texted that time.