Dealing with the ex...it's so tough!

[dviewed]

My commitment to myself has been to not call him or e-mail him, but to be receptive if he calls me. (We split about 5 months ago & he turned to a rebound tramp asap...I tried hard to get him back at first, but have settled into just being his friend while he goes thru his 'mid-life craziness'.)

He'd been pretty down (about her) when we talked Wednesday, so when he didn't call yesterday it was so tempting to call. But I reminded myself of the 2 reasons I implemented the rule:

1. He might not be alone & I would hate the awkwardness I know I would hear in his voice if he wasn't alone and 2. If he calls me I know he's thinking of me...if I call him I have no way of knowing whether he wants to talk & would feel rejected if he wasn't receptive to my call.

Sure enough, he called late afternoon & talked about everything on earth-except her!

Then, when I got home he was there mowing my yard. (We've never given back our keys & GDO's, so we each have access to the other's house still.)

I gave him a big smile & chatted for a minute before saying 'adios' & going inside to change into my workout clothes...tiny little blue shorts & a white tank top. (Hey, I finally saw her last week...she's a pig- he said she's gained 20 lbs since they started dating-& she has smoker's skin which she tries to cover up with tons of make-up, so I know he's made the physical comparison.)

When I heard the mower stop I bopped back out with an ice cold bottle of water.

He may choose to be with her right now, but it can't hurt to remind him what he's walked away from.

We chatted for a few while he chugged the H20 & then I thanked him for doing the lawn & said, "see ya..." & headed back inside to workout. (I wanted to be the one to end it so I wouldn't be standing there watching him drive away...God, I hate when that happens!)

As I walked away he said, "Talk to you later...you sure look good,"

I laughed & said, "Thanks...so do you." and kept on going.

The time I've spent listening to him whine about her has given me such a better perspective. I'm stronger than ever & know I will be ok however this works out.

How about this for irony...I've been telling him that if she dumps him for good, he may look back & realize she did him a favor. Well, if he doesn't come to his senses & come back to me before I move on, I may look back someday & realize he did me a favor! Wouldn't that be a hoot!

You know, I hate the game playing, but it seems required to make sure he doesn't just forget about me completely.

[babycristy456]

My question is...why is it when the exboyfriend gets the rebound girl, she is always a wh0ree and a fat lard?!?!? (from my two experiences)...

 

I kinda appreciate the favor those fatties do for me, which make my exboyfriends all realize what they've lost (not that I have anything against fat people, but its my only defense, since I am thin.)

 

Well, make him miss what he's got. Its funny, my ex used to call me everynight to complain about his new girlfriend too... it gave me a satisfaction that you won't ever imagine. He would also ask for me to help him cheat on his new girlfriend...with me... HA! I would not give him that satisfaction...If he wanted me, he needs to leave her, which of course they broke up finally. but we didnt end up together, whole different story tho....

 

I just hope I'm never the rebound girl...poor poor girls.

 

Well keep up the good job and make him wantttt you bad, and if you move on b4 he makes his decision, then too bad for him.

[dviewed]

You are so right...who knew he would pick a "ho"! Guess his judgment is really impaired! Thanks for the support!