Q/A for woaman or men

[John Blaze]

I been on this web page a lot the past two weeks reading every possible situation that come accross trying to get help some good advice some not so good. I left a post Friday telling my story a quick sum up I been with this girl for two years and we broke up last month we live together and she said I need to move out buy first of Sept. we broke because I kept bring up a issue that came up in our relationships months ago to be honest it was not that big of a deal. the problem is I heard her in her room last night crying late last night my question is why do woman put their self threw that pain to not open up and give it a chance when deep down they are so hurt is it pride or what for the past five days I've kept the peace and let her deal with it with out pressure from me.

[activelife81]

YOU ARE SO RIGHT!!! THEY DO THAT, AND THE REASON I THINK IT IS BECAUSE THEY ARE AFRAID OF OPENING UP FOR ANY VARIOUS REASON...MAYBE A PAST BAD EXPERIENCE OF BEING HURT WHEN THEY SHARED THEIR HEART, OR MAYBE SOMETHING THEY LEARNED AND GOT DRILLED INTO THEIR MINDS FROM THE PEOPLE THEY GREW UP WITH (SOMETIMES GIRLS ENCOURAGE EACH OTHER TO TRY TO CONTROL GUYS AND NEVER SHOW THEIR WEAKNESSES). IF I WAS YOU, I WOULD REALLY GENTLY TRY TO TELL HER THAT YOU LOVE HER (IF YOU DO) AND THAT YOU WANT RELALY BADLY TO WORK THIS OUT AND YOU NEED HER TO OPEN UP TO YOU. IF SHE CHOOSES NOT TO THEN I GUESS SHES CHOOSING LONLINESS.

[John Blaze]

You are so right last week she said "I will not take you back I will not be weak" When she said that I back off and let her have her space

[activelife81]

i dont know your EXACT circumstances...like...what your "issue" was that made you break up in the first place. was it something you need to apologize for that was out of line or is she just being stupid about it? women are usually complicated...unless you can connect with their emotional side, and not take their words for face value. sorry, i know that probably doesnt help much but...just try to really be honest with yourself and think whether or not you need to swallow the pride and say im sorry, or if its really her that just wont budge. i was thinking that maybe once she hears an apology (if one is appropriate for whatever you did) then she would be more open. just a suggestion

[John Blaze]

I have apologue a hundred times the biggest problem is I know she wants to work it out but she being bull headed. And the issue we had was that I kept accusing her of messing with this guy that I truly know nothing ever happen but I would bring it up every time be fight as a weapon to throw at her.

[bzborow1]

Best thing for you man is to not tell her you want to change, show her. Just be cool around her, don't talk about the past with her, just live the present. This will finally allow her to think about everything that has transpired between you two....

 

A lot of women will refuse to be honest in person, they'll close up and just act like a bitch or something to your face. In reality however, they are just fighting the insecurity with the situation. Ie...a women may cheat on someone and say stuff like "we became friends w/benefits"...being a bitch about it...but when they guy walks out on her...in private, she'll be hurting. Women will never show weakness in front of you...(most).

[mk]

I think you should give her space, when she called you, give her care, love and respect. It is a healing process. But it takes time. I never want it this way, but it really hurt. I am stilling in the process of helping her to open up herself more but letting her express her feeling and emotion. Let her cry and comfort her.

 

I want to ask, how should I encourage her not to scare to step back to the relationship and take a step of faith. She said me change a lot and she is really happy. Any suggestions?

 

 

Best thing for you man is to not tell her you want to change, show her. Just be cool around her, don't talk about the past with her, just live the present. This will finally allow her to think about everything that has transpired between you two....

 

A lot of women will refuse to be honest in person, they'll close up and just act like a *beep* or something to your face. In reality however, they are just fighting the insecurity with the situation. Ie...a women may cheat on someone and say stuff like "we became friends w/benefits"...being a *beep* about it...but when they guy walks out on her...in private, she'll be hurting. Women will never show weakness in front of you...(most).