Shy BF afraid of being intimate!!!

[LuciaSeia]

My bf is extremely shy, and I am starting to wonder about him. He doesn't know how to handle things when they start getting intimate. I don't know what or if we'll ever get too intimate because he won't even take his shirt off. I know he thinks the world of me, and is happy that I'm with him. But how can a guy push away a hot girl the second things start to heat up?!

 

oh geez.

[GettingOverIt]

Have you tried talking to him about it? I mean, flat out, ask him why he doesn't like to take his shirt off? Is he self-conscious about the way he looks? Do you know if he's been intimate before? Has he been hurt badly before? Is it a 'religious' thing - I can't think of another way to put that, so that could be interpreted a hundred ways... But, I mean, does he think it's not right to get 'that' intimate before marriage?

 

I'm just throwing out ideas....

[dreamweaverdude]

If he is extremely shy he may not want to not want to 'be overconfident' in showing that taking off his shirt is being aggressive.... maybe he needs you to help him take that first step.. unbutton a button or two for him and see what happens.....

[LuciaSeia]

He does want to get intimate I can tell, because he tells me he wants me to "teach him" in a sarcastic way...then he says he needs me to get him drunk?! he's not overly religious, he's just very inexperienced I'm his first girlfriend since highschool, and he's been out of college for a year. He'a also a virgin.

 

I have tried to get him to be comfortable, and joke that whatever he does I'll match him (taking off shirt)..but now I'm afraid of scaring the guy. I don't know if he'd handle me coming on to him to strongly..I guess he makes me feel somewhat selfconscious because I'm just not used to a guy not feeling secure enough to initiate anything.

 

Maybe he thinks i'm too hot

[al7]

He does want to get intimate I can tell....

he's just very inexperienced I'm his first girlfriend since highschool, and he's been out of college for a year. He'a also a virgin.

 

I don't know if he'd handle me coming on to him to strongly..I guess he makes me feel somewhat selfconscious because I'm just not used to a guy not feeling secure enough to initiate anything.

 

Ok, it is clear what you r saying. So why dont you just go ahead

and help him more in a teasing way?

 

You said "I'm just not used to a guy not feeling secure enough to initiate anything". So if he cant handle your moves, he is not for you. Simple.

Try your best, if he would be scared it is his problem, not yours.