Unconditional. [Comments please]

[Protex]

Unconditional

 

Beautiful brown,

eyes which you have.

Views the depths of your love

the vast canyons and valleys of your affection.

To see such eyes,

without that love.

Makes them only blackened and empty,

with space to fill,

space to be filled with my regret.

 

My body cringes,

I collapse to the ground.

My lungs gasp,

nothing to breathe without the sweet,

warm, air of your love.

My heart stops,

and with one last beat

it mutters 'I'm sorry'.

 

Motionless I lie,

As you kneel down beside me.

Whispering my form of rebirth.

You tell me you love me.

I rise, and tell you that you are my life.

With my eyes open, and fixed on yours.

I see the very love, whose absense killed me.

My lungs gasp, I inhale my very being.

And realize, how lucky I am to be alive.

 

 

Just wrote it, after I realized exactly how lucky I am to be loved by this one special person.

[Finchabald]

thats really good. based on you finding love?

[Protex]

Based on me being stupid, and coming too close to losing love.

[Finchabald]

ok. but your still with them?

[Protex]

Yes, thanks to our love being as strong as it was.

[Finchabald]

thats really gd to hear. its also interesting to see a poem with a happy ending on this forum.

[Protex]

Glad you like it.

[ForAnother]

Your last stanza... is golden. I don't like your mushy first two (they too overused ideas)... but your last stanza... i am speachless... god it is written beautifully. Excellently written. Touched me.

 

ForAnother

[From_Now_On]

That's really very good. It's also great to hear you did not lose this person. The happy ending was refreshing. =)