Is it okay to ask her what kind of guy she's looking for?

[rvr350]

Hi,

 

I'm talking with a gal on the phone, just getting to know each other. Is it okay to ask her what kind of guy she's looking for? Would that be showing too much interest? Thanks.

[San123]

well if you dont want to show any interest then don't say that, but otherwise I think its fine.

[shademan]

i disagree san123 it's an informal way of telling her how can i be more like your type of a guy . or maybe that's me i don't know .

 

 

 

 

Never underestimate your opponent .

[Beec]

I wouldn't. If you wanted to go into this line of inquiry, do it indirectly. How I am trying to think of.

 

But if you ask you are telling her you are interested, which is far from being aloof, and you should be aloof. Let your body language and tone of voice show your interest, keep the explicit indications to a minimum, until she should already know.

[dontknowwhattodo]

I dated quite a lot of guys and never be asked what I was looking for. In turn I never asked those guys this question either. For me I believe that it is good to have some perspective, so I vote for yes, ask her, but not early on in the dating/relationship. I think asking this question when you guys are in the comfortable zone with each other would be nice.

[SkyFire]

If you want to date a chick its GOOD to show interest. Just dont be desparate

 

Yeah man definetely, ask her what kinds of guys she likes.

[Double J]

I agree with Beec. Show it through your actions. I'm sure that as you get to know her better, you'll know what kind of guy she wants.

[San123]

I would listen to the girls!

[Spirits Away]

I think you should tell the girl what type of girl you're interested in and don't ask her for the same thing. There are many other ways to hint interest, and i think by asking that question, it's a counterproductive way to hint that you have interest in her. If i hear that question asked, i'd sense a suck up. You just allowed your date to tell you what she expects of you.

 

I know you're not a suck up, but i'm just saying that it's overall not a good question to ask cuz that's the air it'll give off to your date

[rvr350]

Thanx for all the good advice. I started emailing each other, then we talked on the phone for the first time, and then i haven't heard from her since. I am not trying to show too much interest, as we're both adults, and she's a busy person.

 

Anyway, how would you be able to tell if she's lost interest in you, keeping polite or just plain busy and not be able to chat. Thanks again.