My girlfriend says I have changed.

[Erik Terzich]

She says that because I changed it feels like we are drifting apart. I need any advise and support I can get I want to fix this but, I don't know how.

[lilypadgirl]

There's not a lot to go on. Did she say how you've changed? Did something in your life change or maybe in her life changed? Did she say what you used to do that you don't anymore?

[Erik Terzich]

She says I'm not as happy as I use to, I don't smile or laugh as much. I know there are other things that she hasn't told me. Somethings went on where are was really paranoid that she was cheating or something. I trust her now I have learned from my mistake, I now realize she loves me more then anything and she couldn't trust me more then anyone else. Do you think the problem is that she thinks I don't trust her anymore?

[lilypadgirl]

I really can't say, not understanding the history between you guys.

 

I think you two should set some time to talk to each other because a lot of this is guesswork - which can lead to misunderstandings. Tell her that you hear her and care about what she is feeling and would like to talk to her about her concerns so you can better understand each other. Ask her why she feels you are less happy than before. Before you have the talk though, try to really think about whether you are less happy than before and whether there are lingering issues. If there are, this be a good idea to discuss them with each other and try to resolve things. But if you really do trust her 100%, then this is the time to reassure her and let her know you trust her completely.

[Ayanokōji]

Maybe it is she who changed? If you changed then what are you going to do? Revert back? The problem is what these changes she accuses you of entitles, and if you are willing to change back since she does not like your current status.

[daddids]

People grow, they do not change. Its a natural thing to happen, anything that affects our lives makes us grow. That can be a relationship, a job, a hobby,a pet, anything.

 

If two people love each other deeply and want to be together, those "changes" are overcome.

There is not much you can actually do, you are who you are, you must not change for anyone. As some people believe "maybe it was not meant to be".

[Erik Terzich]

I figured out the problem with me. I discovered I was afraid of changing after having sexual contact or anything sexual at all. I was afraid because so many other people have changed after any sexual contact. I changed because I was scared, I am no longer scared and I am back to my normal self. Thanks for the help everyone. But now I know I won't change. I won't let myself fall like so many others have.