HELP!!!!!

[Aktrez]

I can't get rid of this sinking feeling I have... Nothing is getting better... every day I'm away, I'm getting worse....

 

He has to pick me up from the airport tomorrow.. and I'm so scared to see him. I just talked to him on the phone and he seemed so upbeat.. I couldn't help crying!!!

 

I don't know what to do.. I'm losing my mind.. Please... someone talk to me?!?

[flea]

Hello babe.

Is that u on the pic? U r so pretty. U should send ur pics to modelling competitions or sumfin.

ehmm did u post topics from before or is this ur first? cus i didnt exactly understand the situation.

Anyway relax and let the Universe lead you. Love to you. x

[lillady898]

I've been having relationship troubles, too, but then I realized I just had to kinda let fate take its course. It might be sad, but in the end, you never really know what's gonna happen. I mean, tomorrow, something could happen to make you the happiest person in the world. You just have to look on the bright side and look forward to all the good things that'll eventually come.

[flea]

I totally agree with lillylady. Very smart advice. thoughtful.

 

I believe destiny figures it all out by itself. If you are meant to be that person, you will be with them. If not - well, there is always better, I say. x

[flea]

whoops, didnt mean anything in an offensive way. Pardon me, i confused your name. Lillady898

[deebee]

You really need to cut off all contact from this guy, for your own mental and physical health. I know this will be hard - I've read some of your other posts and kept up with your situation, which I is somewhat complicated.

 

You love him, but he wants to 'play the field' and somehow keep you as a 'reserve'?! And you live together. This is intolerable! If that's what he wants to do then he should leave if he has any respect at all for you as a person, let alone his (former) girlfriend.

 

You must be more assertive in the relationship. Every time he comes back in to your life it kills you inside and there is another post on the forum! Go back and re-read some of the excellent advice others have given you and act on it.

 

There are always ways and means, you are not stuck in this situation. There are actions you can take. Couch is uncomfortable for him? Boo hoo! Get a camp bed and don't let him crawl in bed with you at 2am. Surprise, surprise, he ends up having sex with you which, whilst it's great at the time, makes you feel even worse afterwards.

 

Move out, share a flat with some other girls if that's what it takes. You'll have the beginnings of a social life outside the relationship. Tell him not to contact you for a period of time until he has 'got it out of his system'. And stick to it. For your own sake. Because at the moment it is like picking at a fresh scab - it's painful and it never heals.

 

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but it's well meant and borne out of sympathy with the obvious pain the situation is causing you. There are positive actions you can take. Best wishes.

[toad]

I agree, you need to cut contact with him. It will be painful but it is obvious his place for you right now is "if nothing else better comes along" You deserve way more respect than that than to be a victim of his mind games. Based on the way he is acting you can be assured that as soon as he finds someone else you will be kicked to the curb.

 

No contact is the best thing for this situation as right now he can have his cake and eat it too. Take the cake away and see how he reacts either he'll find someone else (good, lets you get on with your life and find someone who respects you and treats you the way you deserve to be treated) or he will realize how important you are to him and want you back (good, because then you get the respect that he owes you). Either way you win.

 

You've also got to get him out of the house. My ex wife and I lived together for 2-3 months after we decided to separate and it was the most excruciating, heartwrenching, painful experience I have ever been through. All that tension and wondering and worrying. It is impossible to heal while someone is still there opening the wounds for you.

 

Just keep repeating to yourself, you are better than this, you deserve someone who will treat you right, you deserve a good relationship. Try it a couple of times until it sinks in.

[deebee]

Hi Aktrez, how's it going? What are your thoughts on these replies?