PLEASE HELP ME

[moore1967]

hi there

i just want advice how i can get a girlfriend? i feel so lonley and i feel i gonna die like this please help me i do't know what to do iam not shy iam not ugly but i can't talk to girls iam 35 years old i have been a lone for a long time please help me .

MOORE NJ

[simulacra]

Maybe it would lessen your pressure (to just obtain a girlfriend) if you approach your situation from the perspective of wanting to get to know people better in general. Try to get out more, get involved in community events, perhaps becoming closer friends with co-workers. Online forums such as this one are also another good way to get to know people better.

 

Begin by getting to know people on a one-to-one level. That will allow you to decide which people you are attracted to (ie. qualities, personalities, etc). Don't approach the situation in desperation but with the point of view that you have a lot to offer and are open to sharing yourself with another (first on a friendly level, then maybe on a romantic level later).

 

If you are approaching the situation like you "need" someone in your life or that there might be something wrong with you because you're alone, you won't be in the right frame of mind to be entering a relationship. So try to be optimistic and open-minded about not being in a relationship right now. It makes a world of difference to be confident about yourself and your current status which are evident to those around you.

[SwingFox]

Simulacra is downright to the bottom of things. I agree with that Simulacra said. Not being able to talk to girls could be a signal that you fear rejection. Don't forget that women are also human beings with emotions and feelings. Find some general topics and give them a few compliments at times will do a good trick and is a good way to start. If you are looking.