Gadwall

Thank you for not contacting me, D. It's been almost 5 days, it's better this way. You know I'm too week right now to ignore your text. You filled a void in my heart that no one else had. You made me so happy and miserable at the same time. I know now why God put you in my life. Relationships can be a lot of fun, I see that. I will be the source of the fun in my next one. I just hope I can spot the lies - this has never been a strength of mine. I had the love blinders on, I saw the signs, but I wanted to believe in what we had. I am always thinking about you now. It sucks, because I know it is unhealthy for me to be with you. I am trying to do everything right - working out, reading, staying busy, very little drinking. But I feel so alone. I miss waking up next to you and holding you. You made me feel so good when we were together. I've talked to other girls, but it's not the same. Thank you for not contacting me. Eventually this will go away, I know this. But I can't heal if we drag this out. You will always be very special to me. I wish it had been better timing for us. But I can't wallow in the pain of circumstance. Good luck DR. I know some day you'll decide to change and get yourself right spiritually, and you're going to make some lucky guy so happy.