rikachu

Gosh you suck. The biggest mistake I ever made in life was giving you my number. I ask God "what did I ever do that was so bad in life that caused me to have the misfortune of meeting you?" I must have done something extremely wrong that Im not aware of, right? I cant believe you just threw me away for that girl so quickly, so coldly. What did I do to you? I know I should move on but as for now I just cant, Im so full of resentment that it hinders my breathing at times. I find it so hard to believe you no longer love me, but hey, I actually believed at one time that you did, so Im prone to being completely wrong it seems! If you everrrrr came back(and I truly want you to, just so I can break you down) you would need an ambulance ready because I would literally beat you to a pulp. That is a promise. But I know you wont, you couldnt possibly come back expecting anything from me after what you did, if so you have a MAJOR set of balls. I may not even see you when you come back, you treated me so bad throughout this that if I were you I would stay away. At the same time with the way you treated me it would indicate that you couldnt care less about me and wouldnt wanna see me anyway. Guess I will have to wait and see, you were always full of surprises. The day youre back in town will be the turning point for me, unfortunately I still care for you( because my feelings were real) and it will be a little over a month since the BU when you do return. Right now I am just miserable, angry and broken, but my true healing will be forced, whether I like it or not, when you arrive and make a move/or not. I am looking forward to having the last shred of hope snatched away from my fingertips by you. I miss you still.

I dont really know what to say, I know youre with her and youre happy. But I just cant believe you dont still love me, and I know I sound crazy I couldnt be with you again and not feel worthless after everything youve said to me. I was so excited to start a life with you and you seemed excited too, what happened? I was there during the death of family, when you lost your job, when you were hurt. I consoled you, now whos going to console me? Do you ever think about that? How im alone, how Im coping? You discussed with me how hurt you were when you were dumped unexpectedly, so shouldnt you know im dying over here, where is your compassion? You know me so well, you know how I will react to things, you know im fragile, so you would also know that without you I feel miserable and hopeless. You know I am laying in my bed hating myself, you know this! You know Im thinking about you and her together, please let me know youre hurting. You know im waiting by my phone, but you have no urge to call? You arrogantly told me your self that I will never find a guy who makes me feel the way you do, so how ccould you be so cold and just cut me off. Im tired of thinking about it and its only been a week. Im just going to forget we ever happened because Im tired of feeling sh11ty and that is the only way i will heal. Im so embarrassed that you let her talk to me that way, I know youre not coming back because you burned a bridge completely with me. Even someone as arrogant as you wouldnt think they had the skills to get a girl back after doing that.