dita

I just wanted to say thanks to all those who replied to my post, especially Hotmami for making me realize I'm not alone. I guess the first thing to say is that I feel I have made a mistake in what I originally posted in that I've stated I'm in a great relationship but obviously I'm not if I can go and do something like this. By saying this I'm not taking any shots at my boyfriends behavior but at mine completely, if I can't be honest with him then I'm just fooling myself. I also agree with Netman who said that I should have been giving my boyfriend the attention that I was giving to this other guy and also to have given him the chance to spend time with his girlfriend, that is so true...strangely enough he is also in a long term relationship. As for the comment that after being in such a long term relationship I just need to feel that I can be attractive to other people goes, that is definitly not the case, we just connected on all the levels outside of being intimate and I guess one day it just happened. I never intended to sleep with him when we decided to meet, not at all, we've been friends for over 3 years, but I do regret it. It's also not a case of who would I rather be with because at this rate I don't deserve to be with either. I don't believe I was ever leading him on, however, as netman said, it is true that it's difficult if not down right impossible for males and females to maintain a platonic friendship but in this case I swear to you it was just cool, but maybe that's what kept me coming back. I've taken a lot of things you have said into consideration and believe me it has helped tremendously. thanks again D

hi I came on here to get some feedback on a situation I'm in at the moment. I've been in a relationship for about 7 years, my first boyfriend, I was 18. We've sure had our ups and downs but I truly love him, in fact at the moment we've been super cool, the best ever really. About 3 years ago I met someone online, just for fun, in no way meaning to be sexual at all. We talked all the time and we had a lot in common, same sense of humor and such and this led to us meeting probably 2 months after we had first talked. We continued to see each other and just hung out and had a good time, it was strangely platonic and seeing as how I had a boyfriend and he had a girlfriend it seemed ok for us to just enjoy having a good time with eachother if we wanted to outside of our relationships. My boyfriend knew about him and his girlfriend about me, however, getting to the point, last night we slept together. Now, I've read a lot of entries that say cheating occurs mostly when there is a problem in the relationship, but in my case there isn't one. Deep down I knew this was bound to happen, I mean we're super cool friends and I suppose quite attracted to eachother, and I know I shouldn't have gone there believe me I do, but what should I do now? Write it off and tell him it was cool but it cant happen again, I mean not only do I feel terrible for betraying my boyfriend but also his girlfriend. I never meant to hurt anyone, and I know it's gong to kill my conscience, but like I said, deep down I knew it was going to happen someday, i mean its instinctual when you are so close to someone.....I suppose I'm just a little shaken and could use some advice...Please no bashing, I'm quite a moral person but like a lot of people have been saying, shit happens. thanks for letting me vent D