munchkin1607307375

Update: So its been a couple of weeks now, and he told me he wasn't smoking hardly at all any more, just a few drags of his friends smokes now and then, and he wasn't buying them for himself.....

then i found out that he is smoking about 5 cigarrettes a day now, and buying them.... and now i feel really sad.... partly because he's smoking and partly because he totally lies to me....

Now i don't know what to do... the smoking makes me really upset but now i feel like i can't trust him either...

He said he didn't tell me becuase he was scared i would break up with him.... and because he felt guilty....

I don't know what to do..... and he says he doesn't want to stop either at the moment.....

I'm 5'3 and my boyfriend is about 5'5... its great.... i don't have to stand on tippy-toes to kiss him!

You've probably just used up all your 'boy juice' from playing with yourself, so when you come to do it with your girlfriend there is nothing left... it takes a few days for 'the boys' to re-fill!

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So i spoke to my boyfriend about the whole smoking issue, and said that i was really confused what to do because i would never choose to date a smoker, and he said he wouldn't either!! He said he really doesn't like it, and he wants to stop and be healthy, but he's finding it hard as his room-mate smokes loads too... but he said when i'm with him it will be much easier for him to cut down and stop...

So its all good!

Are you sure it was him? how do you know if it was anonymous?

it could be girl juice that you saw too though

Yes they definitely do work.... i did the whole long distance thing with my boyfriend between England and Canada... then two years later i moved to Canada, but still long distance in a different province for school.... its 4 years now since we first met and he's moving provinces and we're about to move in to our own place together in June! i'm very excited! (we've lived together for the last year nearly now but in a shared house and on and off between my semesters away at school)

BUT... they do require a lot of work and commitment, and they can get quite emotional and stressful at times.... but if you love each other then they are definitely worth the work!

You could start by telling them your favourite joke and see how they react... if they laugh then at least you know they have the same sense of humour as you which is always good!!

My boyfriend looks at porn and i don't mind, he's very honest with me and i know about it...there are lots of videos on his computer and magazines in the bathroom, but they are his room-mates too.... and i like watching the videos as well!!

I don't mind the porn as long as it doesn't effect how he feels about me... i did use to worry that he might be comparing me to the sexy ladies and wish i was more like them.... but he isn't and he's told me before that sometimes he just looks at the videos to see other ideas for what we can do together! which is fun!

Thanks for the replies.... i've never really thought about it from his point of view, and the nagging really can't help!! so i'll stop!

Yah.... chew has so much nicotine in it, i tried it once, but i felt so ill!

Well hopefully he'll decide that he wants to stop smoking..... i really hope he does!!

Thanks everyone!

He's hooked on nicotine. If he quit getting that huge load of addictive drug from chewing, he's hurting enough to get it somewhere else. That's why I suggested gum or patches.

I quit smoking for a woman who never nagged and even bought me cigarettes. I knew her hatred of smoking, she left me to deal with it on my own without naggging or a running dialog. I quit for her, not because of her.

Yeh, i guess i don't really understand the whole nicotine addiction.... and i'm sure about five cigarettes a day must be way better than a whole can of copenhagen!

Thanks for your advice... i'm going to try really hard not to nag and get too upset by the smoking.... it must be really hard for him too as he was on the chewing tobacco for nearly 7 years....

I'll try suggesting the patches... i don't think he'll be able to use the gum as he always ends up swallowing it by mistake!

Thanks!

He has to want to quit. Gum or patches can give him his nicotine.

Nagging is ususally counterproductive. No, I'm not pointing the finger.

I know... and i'm really trying not to nag him but i really want him to stop as i don't want this to effect our relationship and i don't want to break up with him, but i don't think i can date a smoker....

I'm just really confused as to what to do... we've been together for a while, and we both love each other and want to be together always.... but now i just don't know what to do... its like i'm torn in half between loving my boyfriend and hating the smoking....

It just seems so silly that he's just started smoking and don't really understand why!

Hi

I just registered as i thought someone might be able to give me some advice.... i've been dating my boyfriend for four years now, and he used to use chewing tobacco all the time.... i didn't mind it that much, but i was very worried about the health implications of it... anyway... he's now quit the chewing tobacco, which i am very happy about... and he is too

BUT now he has just started smoking! only for the last week or so and not much, about 5 a day... but i really really don't like smoking, and i would never choose to date a smoker.... so i don't know what to do.... i love him so much but i hate the smoking.... i have been nagging him a bit about it the last few days, which i know he doesn't like, but i just don't want him to start smoking lots and all the time....

I'm really confused about what to do as i don't think i can date a smoker... but i want to be with him... and i know he doesn't like me lecturing him about the cigarettes so i'm trying not to....but i really want him to stop because i don't want us to break up!

Any advice?!

Thanks