Firstly, thank you all for your replies.
Echo - I realise that she may have moved on and I get a strange feeling at the bottom of my spine when I think about that, not a good feeling but I guess thats one of the things I may have to deal with. She is very attractive and will have no shortage of people asking her out.
I made the mistake of deliberately bumping into this girl for the first few months after we split and I was doing all the things that would push her away, i'm not normally like that but due to the breakdown, I had become dependant on her and I know that is wrong. I bumped into her a few months ago and she asked how I was, I replied "wonderful, i've had a tough time but i've got my spark back", her reply was "Huh, why are you ok all of a sudden now your not with me". Her mum also told me that after they split, she went to her confused and wondered if she was doing the right thing, at that point I should have left her alone but it was after that I hounded her. I was trying to bump into her every week (always in the same place).
JanieMarie - I also like your quote!! I do think about her every day. I've considered dating someone else, which could help me forget about her but the feelings are so strong. It's a nightmare, there's nothing worse than being in love with someone that doesn't love you.
I think that if I open up and tell her where I stand she'll run even further away, she fell for me in the first place because of my care free attitude and life loving personality which I lost. I've now found a new me, I fell like i've come of age, this sounds weird but because of all the things that have happened, i'm now closer to my true friends and family, i now see how relationships work at a deeper level and i've found out who I really am instead of this party mask I used to wear.
I think that the only way she'd consider it, is if we bumped into each other in a club or pub. I've stopped going to the gym where i'd bump into her all the time as it was too painful for me and I for her (she left anytime i came in).
I'll also mention that she came out of a long relationship 4 or 5 months before me. She never spoke about that but apparently the guy tried to keep her locked up away from her friends and family, so when she met me it was a breath of fresh air as we'd go out all the time and I wanted her to see her friends and family. Due to the depression though, I was spending all weekend in the house with her and I guess she was protecting herself from getting depressed again.
I wish I was meeting her for the first time this weekend.
