confused66

to all of you that think i'm trying to look for sympati you are wrong. i know i cheated period. i don't want any excuses and i don't have any for it. i call it weakness becasue i never thought that i would be doing that i thougth i was better but now i know i'm just a pig. all i wanted to do was talk it over cuz believe it or not it is eating me. yes, my fg is away. well she studies in another city and thereforeeee i see her like every month or sometimes two. maybe that is why our bond is not strong enough like how i would imagine i would have. but know u know.

i guess that the i missused the word respect. you all are right about respecting her. when i kissed my friend i lost repsect for her and the girl's husband. what answer do i look for? i don't know? i feel guilty and i just wanted to tlak it over with people that don't know me. i wanted to see how others would see my situation. I have thought of coming clean with her but the problem is that i am her first bf, and i don't want her to lose faith in all guys cuz of me. i thougth of braking up with her but days before i was about to do it she found out that she has to get surgery. her mom tlaked to me and asked me to gave her all the support that i can give her since she has no one else. My gf is pretty but very shy and for her is really hard to make good friends. her surgery would take place in about a year and she is very sacre about it since it is kind of serious. what i'm to do i ask myslef? so far i pretend like nothing happen. when i'm out with her i try to it so she can have a great time, i try to make her forget about the surgery and her healt problems. respect? yes i disrespect her when i kissed my friend. the girl i kissed was like my first love, she couse me pain so much pain. can u imagine been in the weeding of the person u love seeing her kissing other guy? how about hearing about her sex life? it hurt like hell. and for a while i kept my distance i didn't see her for months but it happened. u know weeks before she got married she told me she had feelings for me. i was shocked and surprise and asked why didn she told me all this now and not before. if she had told me before when i was had no fg and she wasn't married then it would had been another story. i do'nt want simpaty for me for i know what i did all i want to do is tlak it over becasue keeping all this inside me is killing me.

the thing is that i woudn't mind if my fg kissed another guy. right now i want her to do it so we can be "even". we both chaeted indeed but it was a moment of weakness. i don't plan to excuse myself i admit what i did but now what should i do ? i didn't go anything further than a kissed. and to make things worse the women i kissed is not only married but she is my bestfriend. we talked about what we did and no one has an answer. i keep on going in my everyday life but that kiss keeps on coming back to my mind.

i been going out with this nice, sweet girl for more than 18 months. i don't think i love her but i respect her. however, there was a girl that i liked, i think that i even loved her, but she got married like 2 months ago. twp nights agai a group of friends went out and in a moment of weakness we kissed. i don't know what to do. i don't want to tell my gf. was it cheating?