Alokinga

I asked a girl I go to college with "coffee this week?" to which she responded with "sorry, unfortunately I have other lectures after our lecture :/" (we're not on the same year). I didn't say it had to be after our lecture, so is she simply declining?

I would prefer to do it in person too, however I won't be seeing her till next week since we don't have class, and even when we have class I can't exactly count on running into her because we have different schedules.

I've been eyeballing this girl in college for a couple of months who I find very attractive. We have a lot in common, very similar interests, and a lot of her friends are also my friends. We only see each other on our way to class (we're not on the same year), but we always smile and give a little wave. We also rarely text, but when we do it's always good fun and banter. I'd like to ask her out for a drink, but I don't know if it's too out of the blue since a long time has passed since we met and I never really showed any intentions. On top of that she left me hanging in a short convo we were having yesterday and still hasn't answered my last text even though she's frequently online, so I wouldn't want to seem too eager by double texting... Thank you in advance for your responses!

Thanks for the advice, but when I say that I mean that I don't want to pester my friends with my lamenting, easier to do that with strangers online haha... and I really didn't put any pressure on the girl, it was all very chill

I will, thanks. Feels bad because she lost interest the moment I discovered how much I like her, truly, as a person... I haven't had a similar experience before. Now I guess I know what to look for. Thanks for listening to my rants, I don't really have a lot of people to talk to.

Went out with her today, it was great as always, but when I was telling her we should do it again she said she'd love to, but as friends since she's seeing someone. So that's the end of that...

We don't have lectures for the next three weeks. She told me she'd be free from Tuesday so we could meet up, I assume she would have the time to just open a text if she's still interested... It's been 11 hours since I sent it, and longer than 24 hours since her last response. Thanks for trying to find reasons to make me feel better, but I can't be in denial forever. I'm calm now, I'm fine with whatever the outcome may be.

Sent her a message asking her when she would like to go out, 7 hours later and she still hasn't opened it... I think my gut feeling was correct, this definitely isn't normal.

Of course, those are my thoughts as well. However, I can't just ignore her when she asks me a question that keeps the conversation going. I'm mostly matching her own texting habits.

Thanks. I'm not pestering her by any means, I've learned my lesson a number of times before. I think she actually wants to continue the texting since I directly told her we didn't have to do it if she's busy. I hope it really is just work and business and not her being too sweet and nice to push me away more openly. Because she really is a very positive person.

There's this girl I go to college with who has been very friendly and talkative with me since the beginning of the year. It started with random fun convos before lectures, then she sent me a message, we went out to a club once and then texted a lot every day during the holidays. After the first week of class, she started responding to my messages very rarely, one time even a little more than a day later (although her responses were always detailed and as warm as before). At one point I told her that if she's very busy she doesn't have to bother responding when it's not convenient, but she brushed it off saying "don't worry, you're not the one who haphazardly responds because he made his life chaotic lol" (I suppose she was referring to her new job, which is teaching guitar a few hours a week at a music school). The thing is, I see that she's online a good number of times during the day, but I get a response at like midnight. We're supposed to go out this week and she seemed happy when I asked her about it, but I don't know if I should keep my hopes up about anything more... especially since she wasn't like that at the beginning. It's strange because in person nothing seems to have changed. We still have a lot of fun together and I feel that she's grown on me in the last 1-2 months. I genuinely have never felt so much connection with a girl before, even with the ones I called my girlfriends. Any ideas why this is happening? Tl,dr: girl initiates convos (irl and in text), we hang out, seems to like me a lot, then starts responding rarely even though she goes online, but keeping the same upbeat tone in messages. Agreed to go out with me this week.

Sorry to hear you also made this mistake... Yes, she told me she'd love to go out after next Tuesday once our partials are over, so I suppose it's going well. And I agree with you on the texting part, but although she responds rarely, her texts are always detailed and she even asked my opinion on something last time, which makes it seem like she does want to text... I don't know, at least I don't feel like I'm forcing things haha

Asked her out now, we're going out next week because she has a lot of work to do. I think everything is fine now!

Yeah, I did just now... I'm just not used to girls coming my way, even if I like it. I've always been the one to initiate, so maybe I don't have that instinct. Plus my last relationship was bad and when I discovered the girl was crazy it was almost too late to jump out. It was my fault because I had rushed things in the beginning...

Yup, sent her a message an hour ago... maybe it's not too late. Perhaps I was too slow and careful since my last relationship ended badly (and started too quickly, before I got to properly know the girl), even though I know for a fact she's completely different.

Not yet, that was two days ago and I didn't know exactly what my week was going to look like, so I just told her I'll do it shor. I really don't think she ran out if patience suddenly. I plan on doing it this evening when I see her at the concert.

A girl I go to college with (I'm first year, she is fourth) seemed very interested in me from the moment we met and now all of a sudden she responds very rarely to my messages. This is confusing to me since she was the one to make a lot of moves. First she came sit next to me before a lecture and started a conversation back in October and we continued to sit next to each other since then because we enjoyed each other's company. Then she texted me about something completely unimportant we had talked about (which was obviously a way to get into my dms). Then we started texting regularly, having fun, she invited me to go to a club with her friends before the holidays and it was great. Went to a concert with her three days ago (we're musicians), hung out until midnight with her afterwards. I said that we should go grab a drink some day and she said "About time! Choose a time and a place and I'll be there" After that, she started to answer my text more and more rarely, sometimes with more than 10 hour intervals, and now I'm super confused as to why that is. We're always laughing when we're together and I'm 100% sure that there's chemistry between us. I plan on asking her out this week, but I don't know what to expect since she's not been giving a lot of feedback these last few days. Everything was going smoothly and little by little I realised that I liked her a lot. Don't know what to think...

The flirty things were when we were both single, didn't mention that. But yeah, i mustn't let my expectations get too high now.

Yes, all her relationships were in person. Don't know if she met them online though.

Thanks for the input. The other guy was someone from snapchat she knew for a year...

I've(19) been talking to a girl(18) on instagram for more than two years. It was occasionally flirtatious, but mostly friendly as we both dated other people (we are both single now). We helped each other through break ups and always gave mutual support in difficult times. We even had a few longer convos over the phone, where she recently told me that i'm the only guy who made her feel so comfortable being herself. Two weeks ago she came to my city for college and we saw each other immediately the next day. It was amazing and the chemistry we had online was even stronger in person. I've never felt such a connection with another girl before. She also told me how worried she was that she was not going to meet my expectations, but i reassured her by repeating how dear she is to me. Then one day later while texting she tells me that she's going out with another guy, which made me feel kinda bad but since we always talked openly about going out with other people i didn't think too much of it (she told me he wasn't great in the end). Then when i asked her out three days later she agreed, but rescheduled two times and put our date on saturday at noon because apparently that's the only free time she has. I then told her that we should reschedule for next week once we'll both have time and she agreed. We're still talking like before, but i don't exactly know what she wants because on the one hand she tells me how much i mean to her and on the other she doesn't seem to put spending time with me higher on her priority list. How do i deal with this? Edit: forgot to mention that she jokingly told me that i'm a reverse catfish, because i look even better irl than in my pictures.