beamer

If anything I've learned from recent experience it's that dating a coworker is absolutely playing with fire and more likely than not, will end up in tears. I pursued a casual thing with a girl from work and ended up being used and manipulated. I basically broke off a 2 and half year relationship to start this fling and it ended last month. Deservedly I'm on my own now and having to focus on myself. I had all the same speech you received such as " the person who made them the happiest ever". Unfortunately what you will learn is some people's words are just cheap, it rolls of their tounge without any reason or thought. The lies she's been repeatedly telling you sums up something simple...she has absolutely zero respect for you as a person and that for me personally is the biggest thing with someone you're either in a relationship with, dating or casually seeing. I discovered that myself and I'll be honest dude it hurts big time especially when you have emotional invested alot into that person. But in your case I do feel the trust issues were always going to be a concern, checking her phone for example, that shows instant insecurities, you can't live yourself in constant worry what she may be getting upto because it would eventually drive you insane. From this experience I would just take it on the chin and move on, I know its alot easier said than done, trust me I've been there recently, but by learning to put the time into yourself, concentrate on the things that make you happy and energised, you will get there it just takes time, but eventually you will look back at time as a dark point and realise that in the longrun you deserve much more positivity in life. Good luck.

Hi everybody, firstly I'm totally new to the forum. I have an issue that I haven't been able to confide in anyone including friends or family so I was hoping this forum may help or give me guidance. So here goes..... So I'm a 33 year old guy who's been in a relationship with my 28 year old gf for almost 3 years, we've been getting on fantastic the majority of this time, yes like all relationships we've had a few disagreements but it's certainly never escalated into anything major and certainly no physical altercations. I love this girl, we get on well, she's been a fantastic support when I lost my mother last year and she's been fantastic with my young daughter (from a previous relationship) when she visits mine. We currently live separate in our own places and spend days apart but the talk of living together is being discussed and looks to be happening in the near future. As I say its a good relationship. However things have changed for me personally and this is the issue. I stated a new job around 3 months ago. In this job its a management and I'm dealing with emails constantly and also teams chat, I got talking to someone in a department who wanted to run some things by me, we spoke on teams chat and seemed to get on really well, both professionally but then also got chatting personally as I introduced myself being a newbie in the buisness. This happened around a month ago. Since then we saw eachother in the office and it was always a smile and a hello if we passed each other. We continued to speak on teams but we got on so well and had a real laugh, although neither of us mentioned our relationship status, didn't see it as appropriate on my side I didn't see this going anywhere apart from being a colleague at work. Now I'm going to be honest, this colleague is very attractive but I was never under any intention of it going further than professional Last week we were chatting again on teams and she just dropped a message with her phone number saying it would be easier to talk then using teams. So since then we have spoken, on a daily basis. On Friday just gone, she told me she found me really attractive and she felt a real connection between and I was someone she was really into. Not sure why I did this but I said exactly the same back, but if I'm being honest with myself and the forum, I do feel like I've made a real connection with this girl, the chat has now started turning flirty on occasions. Before I started getting ahead of myself I told her of my situation that I was in a relationship, and she told me that she was recently but had broken up with her bf. She was quite open about how upset she was about my situation but we've continued to speak daily i look forward to her messages and video messages everyday, i get that butterflies in the stomach excitement when i see shes messaged, I can't stop thinking about her and she continually tells me she likes me but she doesn't want to start anything with someone in a relationship. This is my issue because I love my gf and its never crossed my mind to cheat, what worries me is, if this could be the first time, in my life,that I could change this and lose all credibility in my moral beliefs in relationship commitments. Then I think do I just break it off with my gf, but how? And she'll be asking why as it's come out of the blue, how heartbreaking it would be to see her upset. She has also developed a close relationship with my best mates partner and other partners of my clostest friends. Is this other girl just looking for a rebound although she strongly denies this is the case?My head is so messed up. What do I do? I am so sorry this is such a long post but I've poured my mess out on here. Any advice would be hugely appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read.