long story short:
2 years ago, met at pride, neither wanted a g/f...
we fell in love
for awhile, the honeymoon ended, I stuck it out and fell back into it.. completely happy..fought on occasion, normal I thought.
Wanted to surprise her, went house shopping, bought a house...and during that time... she decided that she didn't feel the same after the last fight...wasn't sure that she wanted a relationship anymore.
3 weeks later...I broke down and told her how I felt - she agreed to try - and didn't...like I couldn't tell?
Now it's 2 months later, and I miss her terribly. We've talked here and there...I feel like she's confused and I want to be there for her but it's hurting me too bad at this point.
Example: She says she doesn't think she 'can do this right now'... I ask her if she wants her space, she says yes. I ask her if I should wait, she says no because it's unfair. I tell her I'm going to walk away and she says that's not what she wants either.
I am in no way blind to the fact that she wants her cake and eat it too...
I gave her until Friday at midnight to show up - and I would be here with open arms ready to start fresh, get counseling, and work this out - I truly love her. I told her I wouldn't call her before then, and that if she didn't show, I would leave her alone and not contact her. Am I just being a moron and letting her go out and party and giving her the opportunity to meet someone else? I'm 28, she's 25 and I feel like she's thinking she's missing out on the bars and the infatuation of new love - but I am wise enough to know that it's such an empty void out there...
Do I send her flowers, give her my poetry? Write her a letter and leave it on her windshield?
Or do I truly ignore my feelings at this point and just sit back and hope, while nursing this feeling inside of sweaty nausea and hurt.
What is more attractive? Being fought for or walking away and leaving her with that feeling of "oh no, what if she's walking away"
Someone please help this boi...I want her back...
B
