um..well..im 15 years old u know...and heres the thing...ive known my best friend for almost 3 years now. at first we were best friends.then we stopped being so close..and now this year we are best friends again..but better friends..closer...we share practicly everything, i know her, she knows me, we like the same things, music, etc..i really likebeing with her and obviously she likes being with me too.but lately, when im at her house i just stare at her perfectness while she sleeps...and sometimes i want to kiss her...we arealways talking on the phone, sending mails seeing each other, hanging out...and she constantly tells me how much she loves me and misses me...and so do i...i just dont know in what way she means it...i dont even know what way i mean it!! but i LOVE to hearfrom her...i get really excited and i cant wait to seeher againor whatever... i dont know if i have these feelings just because we are so close or if its because im atracted to her..sometimes we talk about lesbian friends..or somestuff like that..and she seems to be ok with it...lol..but she has a boyfiend..im sure she is heterosexual...and im almost sure i am too!!! but sometimes shes too sweet to me and she hugs me and kisses me (on the cheek..hehe) and i go crazy...actually when she does i dont do anything...i dont even realise what it means to me until i get back home and start to think about her and all thethings she did to meduring the day...and thats when i think i like her in a sexual kinda way...by the way, shes now on vacations on the coast with another of our best friends...i couldnt go because i needed to study , anyway...im so jelous cos i cant stop imagining how much time my other friend is spendingwith her...and i wanna be there so bad...anyway...what is this i feel?
