Birthday - Should ex be present?

[MeLoveHer]

Again, I have a doubt concerning what to do.

 

My situation is partial NC with my gf, who I would enjoy getting back to. At the same time, I am also partly healed, not thinking so much about her.

 

My birthday is coming and I am going to invite many of our mutual friends for a dinner. She knows it's my birthday too, so should I invite her too? Help pls

[confusedangel]

i think u should. if u can heal with having her in ur life, i think a dinner won't hurt since u are keeping the relationship open for a second chance. she will be hurt if u don't invite her and it might cause some problems since u guys are still in contact.

[Japanfreak05]

I think you should. If you invite all her friends and not her, that would probably make her upset. Her coming should be alright. She'll have all her friends to talk to, so there won't be any pressure. I hope everything works out!!!

[Mavis VDSande]

I agree. But I would go out and have fun for myself and try not to follow her or push a situation out with her being there. Hope it works out!

[Hope75]

It depends-

 

Do you think having her around is just going to make you sad about you two not being together, and bring your whole evening down?

 

Or do you think you would enjoy her company and not think about it?

[MeLoveHer]

Maybe a little bit of both Hope75, but It certainly would never bring my evening down. I will still think about her, but of course, if I have another 15-20 people to look after and be with, I would never put the spotlight of that dinner on her, you understand? At least my consciousness is clear, even if she declines the invitation (she works).

 

I won't try to force anything out of her, I know what she fells about me. Funny thing, she gets upset when I don't give her proper attention. Ah girls! Why are you so complicated!

[MeLoveHer]

Update

 

Birthday dinner went quite well, was a very pleasant evening and most of us had a lot of fun.

 

I say most of us because apparently my Ex wasn't enjoying the moment, as far as myself and some people noticed. Among my invited friends, there was one girl which I had a crush in the past and we even had intimate moments. My ex know who she was. The other girl is very sweet and tender, and talking to her is very amusing, because she is start and interesting.

 

So... it seems that my gf had a high dosage of jealousy on top of her. During dinner, she was caught staring at the other girl several times, mostly when I was speaking to her... I minimized my ex's presense as much as I could during the evening.

 

So it seems there is some hope left... Which gives me some "opportunity" to act.

 

Now the next step is New Year, since we were invited to the same party. What should I expect / do now? Should I keep minimizing her or pay some attention and keep her more confused? Bear in mind that I have healed enough so that I don't regret doing this... of course I will be happy if she comes back to me, but if not, Nc remains.

 

Thoughts anyone?

[Hope75]

I'm a bit confused.

 

You invited her to your birthday party, and then flirted and were intimate with someone else in front of her?

 

What exactly were you trying to accomplish? Do you want this girl back? Were you trying to hurt her?

[MeLoveHer]

No no Hope 75, don't mix things up.

 

I invited not only my ex gf (not to be unpolite) but also a great friend of mine (we sort of dated in the past) to my dinner, excluding other guests not to confuse you more.

 

It had been months since the last time I spoke to my friend, so I missed her a lot and we ended up speaking most of the evening (no intimacy!). I wasn't intending to play tricks on my ex or hurt her somehow, just wanted to enjoy my birthday.

 

But it seems that my ex was sort of jealous for not having so much attention from my behalf as much as she desired, and some people in the room noticed it too... (i didn't, to be honest...)

 

The fact that she was jealous made me wonder if she still has feelings for me. I was the dumped one, and I still care for her, so I wouldn't mind having her back. Additionally, I am healed to a point in which I don't spend time thinking about her and let it affect my mood. Given these facts, how should I react in New Year's Eve?

 

Hope this helps to clear things up