digital fiction Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 Look at yourself... 'At what youve done... No one to 'smile... No where to run... Mistake and mistake... 'Cant tell truth - from the fake... Mistake and mistake... You can - only shake... There is no proof... There is no clue... You have no roof... To protect you... From the rain From your shame... And you get weak... And you cant seak... A life; new... They dont realise... You 'n your cries... 'N they dont realise... You 'n your lies... You've been pushed out... Out, from the crowd... No one can hear you... Shout, out aloud... Look at yourself... Look at yourself... Look at yourself... --- I would love some comments or mature feedback. Link to comment
Joanne85 Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 This is really good. did u make it up yourself? If so you have a lot of potential. I give it an A, keep it up, very much enjoyed reading it. Link to comment
digital fiction Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 Thank you so much! I did make it myself. I'm only twelve so I feel quite proud of it. Link to comment
lost_666 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 you are 12 and ou wrote that?!?!? thats incredible! your amazing, im 14 and i could never write like that. yea ive done some poems but they dont match up to that! well done keep up the good work.........take care xxx Link to comment
Joanne85 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Wow 12, you got started early, dont give it up. If you enjoy doing it then maybe you should check around on the internet for sites that could possibly print it, or even more. You seem very talanted, if you have anything else I would love to read it, you can e-mail it to me anytime!!!! Link to comment
digital fiction Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 Thank you both. Very appreciated. I am glad people show interest in my poetry. Link to comment
lost_666 Posted December 5, 2004 Share Posted December 5, 2004 well who wouldnt?!?! that was encredible! i cant get over how young you are and how amazing at poetry you are!!! did you write it all by yourslef? did you have any help from other people??? Link to comment
digital fiction Posted December 5, 2004 Author Share Posted December 5, 2004 No help but I got the inspiration to write poems from my sis Alex. Shes put up some wonderful poems here too. Link to comment
lost_666 Posted December 5, 2004 Share Posted December 5, 2004 yea i know! ive read them, they are very good, so are yours! i also remember you telling me on msn today! take care and keep writting! Link to comment
From_Now_On Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 No help but I got the inspiration to write poems from my sis Alex. Shes put up some wonderful poems here too. ...you inspire me to smile. I love ya kiddo. Great poem, like always. ur sis, Alex. Link to comment
digital fiction Posted December 9, 2004 Author Share Posted December 9, 2004 Hehe thank you sis. ~hugs~ Link to comment
EmptySoul Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Great job, and extra points for being 12 and writing that great! Empty Link to comment
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